We all have our moments of regret. Seconds, hours, days in life we keep wishing we could turn back time for and redo. Make up for everything that went away. It can be anything. Words spoken at the wrong time. Actions turning in to consequences you’d never see coming. It can be asking a woman if she’s pregnant when she’s really just gained a bit of weight. Or slapping your best friend during a meaningless fight. It can be cheating on your girlfriend or missing out on a trip you really wanted to go on but made a last minute decision to stay home. Or forgetting to ask for that hot girls phone number during that frat party where you’d had a little bit too much to drink. It can be throwing up the same night on your mothers favourite leather couch. As I said. It can be anything.

Remorseful moments have a special way to make an impact on your life. I’ve had my share. But I’ve stopped counting them. Because they keep coming, no matter what. And this was just one of them.

Everything is coming back to life. I can hear the music. I can hear the girl underneath me fumbling with her zipper. I can hear my heart pounding through my ears. I’m surprised that not everybody is hearing it. The loud throbbing is giving me a headache. I’m already trembling. She is still standing there. I’m still focusing. But I can’t move.

The dark haired girl is now dressed. I can feel her stare but I’m not moving. I’m not even blinking. I’m not breaking eye contact.

“Hey, baby, is everything alright? You’ve been in here for ag-“ The voice that broke our silence is now stopping in its track. Someone is entering the room. A slender brunette makes her way in and is now gently resting her hand on Spencers arm. She’s disturbing our staring contest. She makes me blink. She’s disturbing my focus. She looks straight at me. Then turn her gaze to Spencer again.
“Spence, baby, are you alright?” She is now rubbing her arm. Using a nickname she’s not allowed to verbalize. A name that’s not allowed to slip through her mouth.