I think I’m going to lose my mind very soon. I look over at my alarm clock and the big red numbers tell me it is way past my bed time. That is if I had a bed time which I probably should because if I don’t get enough sleep I’m a big grump in the morning and I do not function properly at all. All I can say is going to sleep at 3:30 then waking up at 6:30 for school is not going to make my quota for amount of sleep I need.

Why am I still up? Because a certain brown eyed goddess has not called me to tell me she’s still alive. She went off to her mysterious appointment and I haven’t heard anything from her since she barely let me tell her I love her on the phone earlier. What kind of appointment keeps you out so late that you can’t call your girlfriend to tell her you’re okay? Why was Ashley so vague when I asked her about it earlier? Do I need to be worried about our relationship? Or worse, do I need to worry about Ashley’s health? Oh my god. What if this is like A Walk to Remember, and Ashley and I finally get together and admit we are in love with each other and then I find out she’s sick? Wait, wouldn’t I be the one getting sick since it’s the naïve girl that gets sick? Seriously Spencer. This is what you are going to debate in your head when you haven’t heard from Ashley all night?

Ashley can’t be sick. If something happened to her I would be heartbroken and I don’t know if I would be able to survive without her by my side. She’s always been there ever since I moved here from Ohio. I don’t know how I made it without her before I moved. I guess I wasn’t really living I was just existing. I was just waiting for that one person to bring meaning to my life. I guess I’ve been waiting for Ashley longer than I realized.

Will I always be waiting for Ashley? What exactly will I be waiting for? I know I was waiting for her to admit she felt the same way for me as I did for her and for her to rise above her past. Now I’m waiting at 3:30 in the morning for Ashley to call me after her mysterious appointment and quite frankly I’m getting impatient. I just need to hear something from her so that I know she is okay. I’ll do the interrogation later. I have to know that she’s okay so I text her asking if she is and again I wait. Now I’m just waiting for a reply. My phone buzzes and I see that I have a text from Ashley.

“I’m okay. Sorry love. I’ll explain tmw. Goodnight. <3 Ash.” That’s all I needed. Now I can go to sleep. She’s right about one thing. She will be explaining tomorrow. I feel my eyelids droop slightly. Finally I can sleep.