A hand on my shoulder snapped me out of the trance I was in. An older woman looked over at me with sad grey eyes, her sweet wrinkled cheeks were soaked with tears as she spoke, “Its time to go dear. No need to stand out here in the rain.” Raindrops started to fail down lightly beginning to soak my hair and cheeks, my teardrops blending with them almost hiding them. However, there was no use, hiding was not an option you could she the pain and overwhelming sadness in my eyes, my light ocean blue eyes…

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I had not even noticed it had started to rain until she touched my shoulder pulling me out of my trance. I haven’t really been able to focus since it happened, I mean can you blame me. I watched the most important people in my life get shot down right in front of me. Its been two months since it happened but, it seems like only yesterday. Hell, every time I close my eyes I’m tortured by reliving it over and over again. I hardly sleep because the fear of seeing her eyes closed and my hands covered in her blood haunt me. I can believe this happened to me, to us. What have we done to deserve this? Why would anyone want to hurt us?

I guess now would be the best time as any to introduce myself. My name is Spencer Carlin and I just turned twenty two, the night of the accident to be exact. Yeah, I know right! What a great way to remember your birthday. I had parents that loved and supported me, even when I told them I wanted to be an artist they where there for me, wanting me to be happy. I know I was lucky to have them, I just can’t believe they are gone. I can’t stop crying, my eyes continue to find a way even though, I can’t believe it’s possible for one person to produce this many tears. I am an only child so now, I have no family. Except for Grandma Jo that is and she isn’t even my Grandmother, she’s Ashley. Oh God, Ashley! My best friend and constant source of love and inspiration. We’ve been friends since she moved here to New York from LA when she was six. Our parents became friends when our parents met at birthing class, Ashley’s mom was pregnant with her sister Kyla and my mother’s was pregnant with what would have been my brother but, she miscarried two months before her delivery. I can’t get the picture of Ashley covered in blood laying in my lap out of my head, why did she have to jump in front of me? It should’ve have been me. I guess I shouldn’t really be surprised Ashley had always looked out for me, ever since we were kids she was my protector. Now she’s my hero, the reason I’m still alive. I cant believe my life has come to this. I wish it had been me.