Chapter 4

It is early morning, Sunday March 19^th it is the day of Danas funeral. I still have a few hours, before It starts, The Hospital is not to far from the Church, I think I will go there first and see how Marissa is, It is still hard to think of her as my mother.  I went so long without one. Each day that I talk to her, I can feel myself getting closer to her, It feels good, My father never married again, he had a hard time trusting anyone

Again, he dated many women, but they never lasted more than a year. My mother hurt him deeply when she left, He played both roles of Mom & Dad for me, and kept me number one in his life, and I felt loved and secure.

Marissa is awake and I can tell she is having a good day today. Chemo is so hard on the patients; everyone reacts differently to the treatments. I see her smile at me, and she asks me, If I am ok, She knows it is Danas funeral today, I told her all about Dana, the fact she doesnt know, Is that I will be seeing Bette today, She has told me many stories about her life with Melvin, Katie and Bette, and how much she loved them all. Her most profound wish is to be able to see her Bette again, I dont want to give her false hope about Bette, I think I need to talk to Bette first, It will be a shock to her, to find out she has another sister and that her mom is indeed still alive, but very ill. I need to see if Bette will want to see her again, and let Marissa explain her reasons why she could never contacted Bette again after she left even though she followed Bette throughout her life. This will have to be Bettes decision. It is 1:00P.M; I kiss Marissa on the cheek good bye and tell her I will be back in the evening, to say good night.

As I walk to my car, I start to feel anxious; I have a stack of envelopes that I will need to distribute to Danas family and friends. These people dont even know me, I want to convey to them my sorrow for their loss, even though I only knew Dana 4 short weeks, she touched my life, and when I remember her, I will smile and be thankful I met her, and I was able to give her some small comfort in just listening to her talk about her friends & family.

I cannot believe how crowded St.Luke is. What a tribute to Dana, I am so happy she had so many people who loved her and came to pay their respects.

I am going to sit in the back, I wrote the letters Dana dictated to me for each one of her friends, I am not sure I could pick out who each one is, I did meet Alice & Lara once. I am not sure if they will remember me, I was on the overnight shift, When Dana couldnt sleep, she would dictate her letters. It would be in the wee hours of the morning. Listening to Dana and writing the letters, I did start to feel like I knew them.

I see Alice; her friends are helping her in. The sorrow is so deep for her; I pray she can get through today and her life without her Dana. As I see the group walking to the front and sitting down. The Pastor has a beautiful sermon, Alice & Danas brother does a beautiful eulogy for Dana. In my prayers I say Dana be at peace, you are loved & will be remembered and never forgotten by all who loved & knew you. It was over, and everyone had left the church. I didnt even realize it as I sat there with the tears streaming down my face, until I heard someone say to me Excuse me, Are you ok? I dont remember ever seeing you before, Did you know Dana well? As I looked up through my tear stained eyes, I looked right into the eyes of Bette Porter, my sister. And I knew my life was never going to be the same again.