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    Left behind

    Story written on March 22, 2006 by Vaya.
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    37 votes, average: 3.27 out of 537 votes, average: 3.27 out of 537 votes, average: 3.27 out of 537 votes, average: 3.27 out of 537 votes, average: 3.27 out of 5 (37 votes, average: 3.27 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 6
    Words: 10390
    Story Shortlink: https://www.assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=60085
    Author Notes:

    A story about loss and love. Alice tries to cope with Dana’s death, while remembering her last months alive.

    Waking up, already crying. Or did she ever stop? Alice couldn’t tell anymore. Her head and her eyes were throbbing morning, noon and night. She had never thought there could be so many tears. They never dried up.

     

    She could still tell by the minute how long it was since she lost Dana. It was a mind game she played with herself. 2 days, 23 hours and 11 minutes ago, Dana was still alive. 17 days, 5 hours and 37 minutes ago, Dana was still alive. All too soon she had to count the weeks. She felt a cold stab in her heart when she counted exactly one month. And then another month. And another.

     

    Every minute, every hour, every day that went by without Dana made Alice feel like she lost her all over again. Because it proved that time didn’t stop. It proved that life actually went on. And Alice didn’t want life to go on. How could it? How could anything ever be right again? How could she ever feel remotely happy again? She didn’t want to ever feel happy. It wasn’t right. The thought of everyone’s life just going along as usual, without Dana, made her sick to her stomach. It made her cry and scream into the pillow until she’d fall asleep, burying her head in Dana’s favourite shirt. ‘Tennis anyone?’ She kept it for the smell of Dana. It was still in the fabric when she took it from her apartment. Now it just smelled like Alice’s tears. Dana’s scent had slowly left it.

     

    It was so strange. People said she should take comfort in all the fond memories she had of Dana. Of all the love between them. But Alice couldn’t take comfort in anything. Every time she tried to think about how happy Dana looked when ever they saw each other, when she tried to picture that smile, the goofy one, the one Alice thought was the most beautiful smile in the world, all she could think of was that she would never see that smile again. Dana would never smile at her again. Dana would never smile at anyone, ever again.

     

    That was Alice’s belief. She didn’t believe in the after life. She didn’t believe in a world after this one, where everyone is happy and reunited with the ones they loved. She believed death to be final. And that meant she would never see, feel or smell Dana ever again. That was all Alice could think of when she tried to picture Dana smile.

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    Comments

    1. Vaya – thank you so much. Your story gave Dana and Alice a sense of closure that I didn’t get from the show. They deserved the chance to battle Dana’s cancer together.

    3. thank you. this was much needed, and i totally wanted to see dana and alice get back togeter. at least before she died. :( i too had tears in my eyes as i was reading this. i miss danish.

    5. Great post! I’m with ackemat in that it gave me a sense of closure I didn’t get from the show. And even though it’s a harsh reality, I hated the fact that Dana died alone. Very well written and I loved how went from the present and flashed back to Dana and Alice in the hospital. It made it seem more real. Great job!

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