You’re a good girl. I know you will hate that but you are. You don’t like the world to see you have a softer side, but you can’t hide it. Your eyes always give you away. I know you better than anyone.

I hope you can forgive me one day.
All my love
Mum

Well, where do we start with this one, after nearly fifteen years, I hear from mum I receive I get this letter telling me that my old man has carked it.

Look like he finally met his match. Should have stuck to hitting women and kids. He never lost a fight with us.

Does my mum realise that I was 11 when I became ‘a better mum to him that I was’. Where was my mum?

When I got this letter, I was in Wentworth. Gary came to see me just after. My mum says she knew me better than anyone. She didn’t seem to know that I couldn’t read. One of the other inmates read it to me. Ironically, we all called her mum too. She cried but I didn’t. Just another thing to push down and forget about. What would crying do?

Certificate of Death
Name: Freida Joan Doyle
Sex : Female
Address: No fixed abode (Last known address was Wentworth Detention Centre)
Date of Birth: 17.4.1948
Date of Death: 15.5.1979
Cause of Death: Internal bleeding, injuries to abdomen following gunshot wound

Bloody bastards, I remember saying that as I lay on the wet grass that afternoon. What was I gonna be though? With Gazza gone I didn’t have a chance or anything to live for. Franky Doyle was never gonna make old bones as she? More trouble than she’s worth. Everyone’s always said it

So that was me huh, just a few sheets of paper and some memories, possibly remembered by a handful of people I haven’t seen in years. Gazza and D are both gone. Lee will be married now, if her family has anything to do with it, Dads rotting somewhere and mum…..well who knows.

What is it with boxes? I spent the last few years of my life living in one, only to end up in another one and now the only things left of me are in this one. Well, I’m not having it sat here getting dusty and old with no one to look at it or care about it.

I’m burning the whole bloody lot.

Like me, Like Gazza, Like D, it will burn hot and bright for a short while and then it will be gone forever.