Ashley’s POV

I watched her walk away from me, maybe even for real this time. You see folks; I have this problem and its called idiot syndrome. It causes bad side effects like pushing the person I love the most away, sabotaging my own relationships and sending my self into a deep pit of despair. I didn’t want to believe it but I think I lost her for good this time. This could have been avoided on so many levels its ridiculous.

I saw Spencer disappear into the locker rooms and I felt so angry. Not at her but at the situation, at myself for letting it get this far. I felt the tears spill from my eyes and I wiped at them fiercely. I then kicked the gate in front of the baseball bleachers. I kicked it over and over and over. I was crying and kicking that damn gate like it could save my life.

I then stopped, the throbbing in my foot taking over, and slid down the gate. I hated breaking down like that but I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I was so stupid for letting her walk away and for acting the way I did towards her. I sure as hell didn’t want her out of my life. I needed her. I sat there in front of that gate till the end of the school day thinking. Thinking about how stupid I was. How I was going to make it up to Spencer but most of all how I was going to get her back. It would have to be something big. Something that would get her attention but also everyone else’s. I needed her to know that I was sorry and that I needed her. Like the air I breathe, I needed her. God I’m so in over my head. I thought as I rose to my feet and made the hopeless trek to the locker room. It was of course deserted, seeing as school was long over, and I then grabbed my shit and left. When I finally got to the parking lot, I passed Spencer’s car on the way to mine. I guess she’s still here. I thought as I steady walked to my car. But then I stopped. I stopped because a beyond brilliant idea popped into my genius head. I went back over to her car and saw that her back left side door was unlocked. Fucking Score. I thought. I guess she forgot to lock all her doors this morning. I looked around the parking lot to make sure there was no one in sight. I then opened her door and got in. No, I wasn’t going to steal her car and no I wasn’t going to pull a Brooke Davis and wait for her naked in the backseat. But I did want to talk to her and this was the perfect way. Like I said before…I’m impulsive.