Alice slapped his chest. “Don’t you dare,” she warned.

Evidently, Jasper was more afraid of Alice than Charlotte, because he set his daughter on his lap and smiled apologetically at her.

“Sorry, Angel. Mommy’s orders.”

Charlotte pouted for a moment, but her bad mood evaporated as Alex and James, the twins, bounded up and demanded her attention. I sighed wistfully, wishing my own problems could be solved as easily.

I wondered fervently if Edward would call tonight. The thought had haunted me for weeks. My farewell the year before had been…less than encouraging, and I refused to allow myself to hope that Edward would look past it. I yearned to hear his voice, but at the same time I was desperately afraid of hearing some form of dreaded news…Tanya and I live together now…Tanya and I are engaged… I squeezed my eyes shut to stop the onslaught of emotions that threatened to drown me.

“Whatsa matter Bella?”

I cracked my eyes open slowly and glanced down into little James’s face, which was staring up at me curiously. He looked exactly like his father, Emmett, with curly, dark brown hair and big brown eyes. I forced a smile for his sake, grateful that his four year old mind couldn’t see through my pretenses.

“Nothing’s the matter, sweetie,” I promised. “Why don’t you go play with Charlotte and Alex, ok?” I suppose I didn’t lie as convincingly as I could have, or James was much more perceptive than I’d given him credit for, because he studied me for a long moment. I patted his hand reassuringly and was relieved when he finally scampered off to join his brother and cousin.

When I looked up, Emmett and Jasper were talking quietly with each other and had missed the exchange, but Rosalie and Alice were watching me curiously. They obviously knew something was up and I winced, dreading the confession that they would inevitably force out of me. Neither was aware that Edward and I were still in contact with each other. In fact, I had told them specifically that we weren’t, and they would assume all the wrong things if I now told them otherwise. Worse still, they might take it into their heads that it was somehow their problem to fix. But this was something I had to figure out on my own.