“Rose and Emmett are here too,” I added, still wondering what had set him off earlier.

“How are the twins?” Edward asked. “I haven’t seen them in…awhile.” I frowned, noting again that same hesitation. What did he mean by ‘awhile’? Why was he so reluctant to speak about his family? The topic seemed harmless enough to me.

“They’re…fine.” I spoke slowly, trying to puzzle it out. “Alex loves getting into trouble, and James does whatever his brother does. But you probably know that already, right?”

“Of course. They’re – five now.”

“Four,” I corrected lightly. For once, I could see right through the false assurance that was seeping on the surface of his voice. I didn’t press him, though, knowing that he would never admit anything that he didn’t want me to know. Instead, I made a note to ask Alice if she knew why Edward was acting like this. My previous plan to hide us from her was sort of pointless now that she had seen his name on my phone.

“Four,” Edward confirmed and changed the subject. “I still can’t believe you’re out for Christmas Eve.” In a heartbeat he converted back to the lighthearted side of himself. It was the side I was much more comfortable with, now that we weren’t close anymore.

“Be nice.” I feigned offense. “I still can’t believe you aren’t out.”

“I’m hurt. You’re not the only one who likes to be alone, you know.”

I never said I like to be alone, I thought sadly to myself. The truth was, I didn’t. I only liked being alone when I was with him. When I was by myself, I felt empty. Once, I couldn’t even stand being separated from him, and that was still my definition of alone – being anywhere Edward wasn’t. Even if we were only friends now.

Gradually, I was coming to realize that I had never truly let Edward go. The love I felt for him had been disguised for a time, beneath petty insults and the stress that had engulfed me for months, knowing that our marriage was in jeopardy. It had started when Edward’s job was threatened while he was trying to finish medical school, at the same time my novel was in the publishing process. We’d been pushed to snapping point, and in the midst of all the obstacles, our love was left behind and forgotten. I ached for the easy days before, when our love was pure and real, the only thing that mattered to us. What had happened?