“Getting Advil.” Ashley mumbled and I could hear the hoarseness of her voice. She turned in our direction. “Spencer?” It was like she didn’t recognize me right away.

“Hey Ash.” She was wearing an ocean blue tank top and black yoga pants which normally where form fitting, but now hanging loosely on her weakened frame. Black circles had formed under her eyes, which looked dull without their usual sparkle.

“What are you doing here?” Her voice tried to rise to a normal volume, but came out rusty.

“Came to check on you… I was worried.”

“Well, not dead yet.” Coughing she downed the pill with a glass of water

“Ashley…” After catching the look form her sister, Kyla excused herself with an exasperated sigh.

“Can you take those while you’re recovering?”

“Do you think I fucking care?”

“S-sorry… just wondering.” Running two hands through her hair, she tugged it lightly.

“No, no. I’m sorry. Sometimes I get a little agitated. Uh, Fuck I’m so screwed up!” And even though I came here determined to just check on her as a friend or just as someone who cared. Even though I promised not to fall back in love with her… I couldn’t help it because when you really love someone it doesn’t matter what happened. When you really love someone, they come first no matter how stupid a choice it may seem because in the end there is no choice – it’s always them.

I wrapped my arms around Ashley’s fail shoulders.

“Ssh, no you’re not baby. We’ll get through this.” She gripped tightly onto me, shaking.

“I don’t deserve you.” I almost didn’t say anything. I almost let my bitter resentment and anger build up, but then I remembered that it wasn’t Ashley’s fault (in a sense it was, but I couldn’t bring myself to fully blame her). I was mad at the drugs, at those people. I don’t know if she would have still gone down that path if none of those horrible things would have happened, but I like to believe she wouldn’t have.

“You deserve everything.” She pulled away after a few minutes and wiped her eyes with the palm of her hand.

“Wanna go up to my room.” I should say no…

“Sure, but first let’s get you something to eat. You look awful.”

“Thanks, Spencer.”

“C’mon, what do you want: toast, cereal-”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Too bad. Toast it is.” I began rummaging around as Ashley stood defiantly in the corner.

“I don’t want fucking toast!” Sighing I set down the bread and turned towards Ashley.

“Baby, your form fitting tee looks like a large; I could feel your ribs when I hugged you and I know you haven’t been eating. So you will be eating the damn toast.” She took an intimidating step towards me.

“Make me.” She growled. I tried to rise up on my feet to Ashley’s height.

-Ashley’s POV-

“Ashley, stop being a stubborn jerk and eat it!” Spencer demanded. “Ow!” She looked up at me with a look of betrayal and hurt as her chin started to tremble. I looked at her in disbelief. I just… I just shoved Spencer – hard.