He leaves the wooden door open for me and disappears somewhere in the house before I can make it up the steps, I don’t even bother to see where my parents are and I just trudge up the stairs and to my room. I don’t even bother going on my computer or changing out of my clothes, I just get under my down comforter and settle into my bed to take a nap. I don’t even bother closing the shades.

After some time passes by I can sense someone watching me, I don’t even bother opening my eyes as I speak

“What Aiden?”

He laughed, “How do you always know?”

“Because I can sense your creepiness, what do you want?” I ask still not opening my eyes

I hear his feet walk the short distance and my bed dips where he just sat down, “I wanted to see how you were doing” he replies a little unsure of himself “if you needed anything or wanted to talk, ya know?” he adds

I finally open my eyes and see that he’s changed out of what he was wearing earlier and somehow he’s miraculously showered.

“What would I possibly need to talk to you about big brother?”

He sees my smirk and he smiles, releasing the breath he’s been holding.

“So…you and Ashley huh? I have to admit, I kinda figured something was going on”

“Oh yeah, how’d you kinda figure that?”

“Do you want me to list the reasons?” he asks holding out his fingers ready to count

“No, no that won’t be necessary” I reply swatting his hands down

He laughs and roughs up my hair and it reminds me of simpler times when we were younger and each others best friend.

“I um, I was afraid that you’d be upset or mad if you found out”

“Nah, I’m kinda pissed that I have to watch my girlfriends around you now” he’s smirking again and I know he’s kidding

“And I guess I can sleep at night now knowing you’re not out with some of the guys I hang out with” he adds

“Oh please like you ever lost sleep over that”

“But now I guess I can’t beat some punkass if something happens to you, can’t go around hittin girls” he continues

“oh like you could” I teased him

He roughed my hair up again and I glared at him

“you alright though?” he asks turning serious again

“I will be” I reply honestly

It’s the truth, I already feel a little better than I did before at Shannon’s house. Maybe I was getting better and I didn’t know it. I mean I can talk about her again and not want to punch a wall, that’s gotta count for something.

“Alright well, you wreak of booze so sleep it off” he says getting off the bed and walking towards to door

“Hey” I call out and he turns around “Thank you”

He coughs and I can tell that the mushy moments are over

“I just wanna see you happy again lil sis” maybe not

He closes my door softly.

“Me too” I softly respond

I lay back down and recount the events of last night and the conversation I had with Ashley. Remembering her tired eyes, her broken voice, her desperate tone, when she said she loved me.

“WAIT” I shot straight up in my bed wide eyed

She said she loved me, how could I have forgotten that tiny detail.

A small smile creeps onto my face but quickly disappears when I realize what I did after her confession.

I have to make this right.