“Um sir, can I go to beach with my brother?” I asked him. He started to say something but then paused, “Yea whatever, be back here by three, no later.” Three what the fuck, I had no energy to argue especially since there was no point. “Yes sir no later; um thank you.” I said.
 

I got to beach and there was Glen. I smiled towards him and he gave me a hug. “Hey punk, let’s get some food.” He said to me. I smiled again. There was something in his eyes that made me breakdown right in front of him. Damn it I didn’t know what had happened, I was trying to be brave and strong but there was no evidence of those traits left in me.
 

“Spencer what’s wrong?” He asked me. Fuck…Fuck “Glen I’m fine, just a little emotional, it happens, let it go.” I pleaded with him. “This time I will, next time will be different.” He told me.  He left to go get the food and the next thing I see is Ashley standing two feet away from me. She started to talk to me and I dismissed her. It was easier to be a smartass then convey my true feelings. I noticed she left and in that instant my face was overwhelmed by tears.
 

After lunch, Glen dropped me off and Reagan called to see whether I had planned anything for tonight. I told her no and she told me she’d pick me up around nine. Steven liked Reagan I could probably get him to let me spend the night.
 

A few hours passed and here she was. “Wow Carlin, this is a nice change.” She said with a smirk. I mouthed a ‘fuck you’ and she laughed. “Thanks for this Rae, I needed this.” She gave me a knowing look and simply smiled.
 

We got to the club and I ordered a beer to start off and after I was pressed up against some girl. I was getting into it but something stopped me and I walked into the bathroom. I completely broke down everything escalated for bad to worse. I heard someone get out of the stall but it was too late to push back the tears that surfaced my face. God damn it, does she always have to fucking see me so broken. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong I can’t seem to compose myself anymore.