“Oh my God!!” I exclaim snapping the laptop shut. “That’s disgusting!” Why’d she even have to bring invertabrates into it? I turn off the light and try to sleep, but first I gotta wash that chapter out of my brain. Sleep comes, but not swiftly.

I had been sleeping deeply but find myself slowly coming to consciousness. I don’t quite understand why, it’s still dark and I’m feeling groggy. I become aware of a strange sensation, feels like the light tracing of fingertips moving slowly up my thigh. The higher it goes, the more I stiffen. For one thing, it feels pretty good. But I’m also kind of concerned as I don’t recall anybody actually getting in the bed with me. I’m pretty sure it’s not the Ghost of Christmas Eve ***** Past. I summon my courage and snap on the light.

And there she is before me. Those eyes. That face. Sweet God in Heaven, that body. Geez, she’s not even wearing a thong! Wait, elf slippers. She’s wearing elf slippers? I find them fetching and just a little disturbing all at the same time. Certainly fashion forward of her in any case.

“Um, ah, humahnah…” I begin. “B-b-b-bette, what are you doing here?” I ask, my vocal cords finally in gear.

She doesn’t answer right away. She gazes at me with her brown eyes. They remind me of how very fond I am of chocolate. And some other things I like even better. Her gaze is steady, but her eyes smolder. At last she speaks. “I had to come” she says. “I could feel you out there, somewhere, and I found you. I need you to complete me.”

No *****! Talk about your stunning revelations! Under the covers the tide rises. On my face my eyebrows reach apogee. Or so I thought until I feel a hand caress my buttcheek. I hear a sultry voice from behind me say “Ditto for me, Babe.” The sound alone would’ve caused me to jump, but the effect was magnified by the not gentle squeeze she gave.

“Tina?!?” I turn to regard her and find all she’s got on is a large red bow, a well chosen shade that looks good with her hair and skin. I sit up in the bed looking from one to the other, my head turning from side to side as I try to process their presense in my bed. I can’t. I wipe the drool from my chin before addressing them. “Ladies, you have some explaining to do.”