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    Diary of A Most Definitely Mad Addict

    Story written on March 24, 2005 by T6beach.
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    46 votes, average: 2.78 out of 546 votes, average: 2.78 out of 546 votes, average: 2.78 out of 546 votes, average: 2.78 out of 546 votes, average: 2.78 out of 5 (46 votes, average: 2.78 out of 5)
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    Genre(s):
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    Character(s): N/A
    Number of Comments: 5
    Words: 3666
    Story Shortlink: https://www.assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=52750
    Author Notes:

    Bette, a bag lady, a bus ride and a little imaginary “back door” sex . . .

    I detected a sense of pride in her voice as she chatted about her skills.

    The names Shane, she continued and extended her hand to me. I found it odd that she wore gloves in the middle of spring, gloves with the ends of the fingers cut out but gloves nonetheless.

    Shane? I repeated as I tried to suppress a giggle.

    Yea, yea, yea, I know, its a ***** one for sure, but my parents had a thing for Alan Ladd. Guess they didnt care that I was a girl I musta had ten different pets growin up, dogs, cats, hamsters, goldfish and my fool parents named each and every single one of them Joey. My parents were morons. You know anybody named Shane, besides me and that ***** girl from that ***** show?

    I was stunned, and she obviously knew I was stunned by the way my mouth remained open with no words coming out, my hand still grasping the ice-stuffed handkerchief held to my forehead, dripping cold water drops down my arm onto my shorts.

    Whatcha looking at? the old woman continued. We got cable in the shelter. And I think you better get that bump looked at there Missy. It sure is swellin and doesnt seem to be clottin up at all. The bus that stops here will take you right to CouGen.

    She took one more hit of Scotch as she surveyed the benches in the park across the street. People were eating, chatting, enjoying the sunshine and leaving everything imaginable behind as they got up to leave.

    Ya wanna know something even more ***** than my name? I got a boyfriend at the shelter name of Carmen. Italian guy used to own a pizza shop. Thing burned down, he had no insurance, no family, nothing. Just ended up there like me. And let me tell ya, hon, that little guy is one hot piece of pepperoni if ya catch my drift !

    She laughed out loud at her description of her little manwhore and slapped me on the back. Not expecting such a blow from this tiny street dweller, I jerked my head forward and banged the icebag on my gash causing it to bleed again. (MOTHER ***** ME THE OLD WOMAN IS TRYING TO KILL ME). She continued to giggle as she once again peeked through the binoculars to watch the crowd across the street.

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    Comments

    1. Lol @ FUCK YEA, BABY, WHOSE YOUR DADDY, GABS, WHOSE YOUR DADDY
      Damn beach-daddy, you got A LOT of babes to take care off. Your paternal instinct is really touching!

    2. This was one jam packed Bette Fuckinlicious chapter! “You know anybody named Shane, besides me and that gay girl from that lesbo show?” <--I pee'd! I have to say Beach, that K sure is onto your every move sister. I love it. "OH YEA, BABY CAKES, I KNOW YOU LIKE IT FROM BEHIND, DON’TCHA?? WELL, LET ME GIVE IT TO YA JUST THE WAY YOU LIKE IT" I'm F'n speechless. Outstanding. CouGen must have some file on you.

    3. Okay, LMAO! That has made me come out of lurking for the past 2 days…………..yes, I’ve been abstent for the last SEVERAL months………….winter, an addiction to The L Word, and my fuckin’ Panic Disorder-with GERD, and where the fuck is my muse…………all I blame for the lack of my presence……………I will read the rest of your pieces that I’ve so missed the last several months………..and as soon as I find my fuckin’ muse again…………I’ll try to finish Funky Town-what do you make of a broken heart-try to start Dana’s version of ‘what do you make of a broken heart’ and also, As Time Goes By……………and this just has to be said…………..I know that one of the writers and/or producers (maybe even that freak EZ Girl) has been reading my stories and comments…………because, please note that she chose to use “Finally” by Ce Ce Peniston for Dana and Alice’s first fuck scene…………yep! yep! Yep!! :D

      Okay, I done rambling (damn Beach, you bring the rambler out in me) and giving you 5-more-Stars! :D

    5. seahurst, how are you so sure that it’s her IMAGINATION?! *snickers*

      god, beach, you’re hilarious. :) all this neurosis could turn into the narrative of THE l-word fanaticism syndrome… keep at it and keep us informed of further developments. i love reading this piece of crazy journalism.

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