Chapter 1

The horns that honked incessantly went unnoticed as a white van erratically changed lanes to merge to the curb decorated with “NO PARKING” signs. The van pulled up to the curb and the woman inside shifted the van into “park” as she chatted away on her cell phone.

“Ugh I hate LAX traffic,” Alice bitched into the phone.

“Who are you picking up at the airport?” Shane asked, curious as to why Alice hadn’t made an appearance at The Planet yet that morning.

“If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise would it?”

“You like just being able to one-up me don’t you?”

“It’s really what I live for Shane,” Alice laughed as an airport police car pulled up behind the van.

“Ma’am you can’t park here.”

“Ma’am?” Alice dropped her voice to speak without being heard by the airport security guards. “Do I seriously look like a ma’am to you?”

“I’d never call you a Lady.”

“Thank God,” Alice sighed. “I was about to throw myself into the oncoming airport traffic from hell!”

“Ma’am!” Alice focused on the young officer who was becoming increasingly annoyed with Alice’s behavior. “For the last time you can’t park here!”

“I swear they are coming out in a minute,” Alice pleaded. “Just give me one minute and you’ll see. They’ll be here.”

“Will the mystery guest really be there in a minute?”

“Not a chance in hell,” Alice muttered back.

“You better not be here when we circle back,” Alice was warned.

“No problem,” Alice smiled sweetly. “Can airport rent-a-cops actually give you a ticket?”

“From what I know they can.”

“Then I’ll pay in Monopoly money so we can all live in the fantasy world they call employment,” Alice rolled her eyes as she leaned against the car. “How long will you be at The Planet?”

“Do you want me to wait for you?”

“Well yeah,” Alice scoffed. “I thought that was obvious.”

“I’ll wait another hour or two, but I have to go to work after that.”

“I’ll see if I can’t wrap this up before you leave,” Alice wiped a bead of sweat from her brow as she scanned the doors waiting for her guests to arrive. “I’m not sure if it’s worse picking someone up from this hellacious place or actually going inside.”

Alice threw her hands up signaling her guests where she was parked. She quickly ended the conversation with Shane and threw her cell phone inside the van not caring that it bounced off the seat and landed on the floor with a thud.

Alice ran up to her guests and threw her arms around the small woman in front of her.

“Oh my God Donna,” Alice swayed back and forth with Tina’s mom in her arms. “It is so good to see you!”

Donna Kennard, dressed in a pair of Capri pants and a t shirt that said ‘Sun Your Buns in LA’ affectionately hugged Alice back.

“And where did we get this little gem of a shirt?” Alice said with a smile on her face.

“The gift shop inside,” Donna smiled. “That’s why we’re late getting out here. I bought Tina and Bette matching sweatshirts too!”

“They’ll love it!” Alice shouted just shy of a mocking tone.

Jonathon grabbed Alice and hugged her as the airport police pulled up once more and honked the horn.

“Jesus,” Alice yelled in their direction. “Can’t you see they’re here?!”

Alice pointed to the van and told Jonathon to load the bags before they were given what she termed a ‘fake ticket’ and turned to hug Jackie.

“I can’t believe you’re here!”

“Me either,” Jackie smiled putting her sunglasses on to shelter her eyes from the California sun. “Did you tell anyone?”

“Contrary to popular belief, I can keep a secret.”

“Because we threatened you?”

“Something like that,” Alice admitted sheepishly as she hugged James. “I bet you can’t wait to see Bette.”

“Both of them,” James corrected Alice with a trace of warning in his voice.

“Well let’s go see them right now,” Alice announced with a smile on her face before turning in the direction of the police car. “You see how we’re leaving?”

The airport officer rolled his eyes and nodded as Alice smiled proudly at the bags being loaded into the van.

“Nothing like rolling out the welcome wagon for the Southern folks,” Alice mocked as she got into the driver’s seat and started the van once more.

The radio blared as the van came to life scaring the Kennards to the point of jumping in their seats.

“It was a good song,” Alice rationalized with a shrug.

Alice pulled out into traffic without checking her blind spot knowing that cars would stop as she pulled out in a larger vehicle. She waved and smiled as horns blared at her while she cut over several lanes to exit the airport terminals.

“You’ll learn that you just have to go here or you’ll get run over.”

“Or get run over driving near you,” Jackie muttered as she held onto James’s hand tightly. “Wow look at that sign!”

Jackie’s mouth hung open in surprise as they began to pass the LAX sign at the entrance of the airport. She snuggled into James’s arms as Alice signaled and crossed over lanes of traffic to pull off to the side of the road.

“Let’s do this,” Alice shut the car off and unbuckled her seatbelt getting out of the car.

“Where are you going?” Donna asked shocked at Alice’s erratic driving.

“Grab your Polaroid camera,” Alice said as she urged the Kennards to get out of the van and stand near the sign to take a picture. “You have to get a picture with the LAX sign.”

“Is this legal?” Donna asked scurrying to the sign.

“Think of how this will look on the cover of your scrapbook!”

Jonathon and James stood behind the ladies that leaned into the sign so Alice could snap a picture. She did and grabbed it as it came out of the camera.

“Oh look how it ejects itself!” Alice said smiling. “Let’s get creative!”

Alice bit her bottom lip while her mind played out scenes in her head of intriguing poses to catch people’s attention.

“Let’s personalize these pictures.”

“How much more personal can they get since we’re in them?” James asked exasperated to be standing near the sign. “We look like tourists.”

“Right,” Alice mocked. “Because the ‘Sun Your Buns in LA’ shirt wasn’t a dead giveaway. Jackie get on the ‘L’ and work it.”

“Pardon me?” Jackie looked shocked.

“Work it,” Alice prodded.

Jackie got on the ‘L’ and smiled hesitantly.

“Work it,” Alice snapped a photo and took it away from the camera placing it near her on the ground. “Own it!”

Jackie straddled the ‘L’ more seductively bringing a smile to Alice’s face.

“That’s it Girl,” Alice said pleased with Jackie beginning to loosen up. “Work it, own it, make love to the bitch!”

Donna gasped as Alice snapped picture after picture of Jackie hanging on the sculpted letter enjoying the feel of abandonment.

“I think that’s really good,” Donna suggested hoping to thwart the impromptu photo session. “We should get going to Bette and Tina’s if we want to surprise them today.”

“Oh God,” Alice fanned herself as she removed the camera from near her eye. “That was hot.”

Jackie smiled as she climbed off the letter and ignored the honking of cars passing by taunting her.

“I’m spent,” Alice announced walking toward the van. “I almost had an orgasm.”

“Oh dear,” Donna muttered feeling a blush creep up her neck. She fanned herself with a book titled ‘How to Tour LA for Dummies’ with one hand and clutched her purse with the other as she closed her eyes, trying to ignore Alice’s driving habits.

“I’m so excited to surprise Tina,” Jackie said with a smile.

“Oh they’ll be surprised,” Alice muttered chuckling under her breath. “I can’t wait to see their faces!”

“I hope we don’t intrude too much on their lives,” Donna said worried. “I was torn whether to call them or not to see if it worked with their schedule.”

“I happen to know that they both were taking a long weekend this weekend, so they’re actually just home hanging out.”

“Why did they take a long weekend?” Jonathon enquired. “I hope everything is ok.”

“Oh it is, but they’ve had a long month of work. Bette’s been traveling and then when she got home, Tina would be on her way to some stupid set thing for the studio.”

Jackie felt a wave of nervousness in her stomach at the thought that perhaps Bette and Tina had other plans for their long weekend. However, she dismissed it quickly due to the fact that there was nothing she could do to reschedule now that they were here.

Tina faced Bette and looked into her deep brown eyes as they lay next to each other in their bed. Tina was naked, her clothes discarded on the floor unnoticed, lying on her side. Bette had a black bra on and her Levis, unbuttoned and gaping open.

Bette stroked Tina’s cheek lovingly eliciting a smile from her lover.

“I can’t believe it’s been over a month,” Tina said fascinated with running her finger over Bette’s bottom lip. “It’s been so crazy for us.”

“We have the entire weekend to make up for lost time,” Bette chuckled causing goose bumps to form on her skin.

Bette allowed her fingertips to caress Tina’s soft shoulder as she stared into her eyes. Tina’s breath caught in her throat causing her to smile seductively at Bette. Bette tickled her way down Tina’s arm, intertwining their fingers as she reached Tina’s hand.

Bette rubbed her nose against Tina’s lovingly, taking her time to savor their interaction after a long drought of intimacy. Bette unraveled their fingers and tickled her way back up Tina’s arm to her shoulder. However, this time, she traced her skin with one finger and then moved the finger down to the valley between Tina’s breasts.

“That feels good,” Tina sighed as her eyes fluttered shut.

“I’m glad. It feels good to touch you.”

Bette propped herself up to hover over Tina, her lips so close to Tina’s mouth that Tina could feel Bette’s breath on her face. Bette kissed Tina along her jaw line, skipping over her lips momentarily, and kissed down Tina’s neck. Tina held Bette’s head steady on her neck as Bette’s lips nipped at the sensitive skin near her ear.

Bette moved to Tina’s lips, taking the tip of her tongue and tracing Tina’s lips with it slowly. Tina opened her mouth as Bette’s tongue gently slipped inside and licked upward tickling the roof of Tina’s mouth.

Tina held onto the back of Bette’s neck pulling her into a deeper kiss. Their tongues dueled with one another for control, Tina finally allowing Bette to set the pace of their interaction.

Bette’s hand roamed downward tickling around Tina’s nipple, but not allowing any contact with Tina’s hardened nub. Tina turned her head breaking the kiss to take in a much-needed breath.

“Touch me,” Tina begged as Bette gently moved her fingertip across Tina’s nipple.

Tina’s body arched as her hands made their way to Bette’s back and she fumbled with her bra to try to gain access to her breasts. Bette chuckled as she pulled back and looked down on Tina’s frustrated face.

“I want this off.”

“I see that,” Bette smiled. “You should remedy that quickly.”

Tina tried once more to unclasp Bette’s bra, but failing to do so resulted in her grunting and yanking the straps down and pushing the cups down to free Bette’s breasts for her to touch.

“Excited Babe?” Tina rubbed her thumbs over Bette’s hardened nipples. “God I love the feel of your breasts.”

Bette moaned as she lowered her lips once more to Tina’s, the once gentle kissing now becoming increasingly demanding. Bette removed her hands from Tina’s breasts to unclasp her bra and allow Tina to discard it quickly.

Tina slid her hand down to Bette’s hips, massaging her hipbones over her jeans. She inserted a thigh between Bette’s legs as Bette began to grind herself on Tina’s thigh.

“God I need you,” Bette moaned her need growing desperate.

Tina slid her hands into Bette’s back pockets to push her harder against her thigh. Tina’s lips attached to Bette’s neck and began to suck, conscious of how far she could manipulate the skin before leaving a mark that Bette surely wouldn’t be pleased with.

“I love the taste of your skin Bette.”

Bette moved her hand down between their bodies gently touching Tina’s damp curls. Her fingers parted Tina’s lips allowing her arousal to seep out and down her slit, wetting the sheets below her body.

“Oh,” Tina arched her body in response. “Fuck me Bette.”

“I plan to,” Bette chuckled in a sexy tone before moving her finger against Tina’s swollen clit. “You like that don’t you?”

Tina moaned as she arched her hips to rub against any part of Bette she could. Bette used the lubrication from Tina’s own body to wet her clit and massage it harder.

Tina groaned when the shrill sound of the phone rang through the house. Bette ignored it and massaged Tina harder, unwilling to allow the real world to intrude upon the beginning of their weekend of seclusion.

After the fourth ring, the machine picked up and Bette’s voice rang through the house announcing they were unable to answer the phone and to leave a message. The sound of a dead line echoed through the house and finally the comfort of silence was restored.

The phone rang once more, causing Tina to grunt in frustration, and place her hands on Bette’s shoulders angry at the intrusion.

“I bet it’s Alice,” Tina groaned.

“Let the machine pick it up.”

Bette went back to kissing Tina’s neck as her fingers massaged Tina’s hardened nipple. Once again, Bette’s voice rang through the house saying they were unable to answer the phone and requesting that a message be left.

“I know they’re here,” Alice said standing on the front porch. “Both their cars are here.”

“Their house is amazing,” Donna said staring at the perfectly manicured landscaping.

“Wait until you see the inside and the pool,” Alice cupped her hand over her cell phone while she waited to leave a message. “Bette I know you’re in there!”

Bette picked her head up and practiced rhythmic breathing to try to calm her temper at being interrupted.

“Didn’t you tell her we weren’t socializing this weekend?”

“I told them all,” Tina shot back. “You can’t blame me if she doesn’t listen.”

“I’m going to kill her.”

“I’m out here if you haven’t guessed since I can see both of your cars,” Alice said in a sing-song voice. “I have a surprise for you!”

The machine cut Alice’s voice off, but Bette remained balanced on her forearms hovering over Tina’s body.

“Did she say she was outside?”

“That’s what she said,” Tina ran her fingers over Bette’s bare back. “If we ignore her she’ll go away.”

“She won’t go away; this is Alice we’re talking about.”

The phone rang once more, coupled with a series of knocks at the front door, making it painfully obvious that Alice had no plans on relinquishing her efforts to interrupt Bette and Tina.

“I’ll go,” Bette announced hearing Alice screaming from their front porch to let her in. “If I’m not back in 5 minutes you better send someone to help her.”

Tina moaned at the loss of closeness between her and Bette when she stood up and searched for the closest t-shirt to her.

“I swear she never learns,” Bette mumbled in frustration as she pulled her t-shirt over her head.

Bette stormed out of the room and hurried toward the front door where Alice was leaning against it. When she opened it, Alice stumbled almost falling inside, but Bette was quick enough to catch her and prop her back up.

“It’s about damn time,” Alice rolled her eyes when greeted with an angry Bette.

“Weren’t you told we were having a long weekend?” Bette arched her eyebrow in challenge to her friend.

“Surprise!” Donna Kennard jumped out from below the porch causing Bette to clutch her chest.

“Oh my God!”

“I didn’t mean to scare you Darlin’,” Donna walked up grabbing Bette into her arms. “We thought we’d surprise you with a visit!”

“Can you believe I kept it a secret?” Alice asked with a wide grin on her face.

“Actually no,” Bette answered trying to comprehend the scene in front of her.

“Hey Bette!” Jackie grabbed Bette in a hug and patted her back. “Is my sister here too?”

“Um….” Bette was at a loss for words.

“Hope you don’t mind,” James walked up and hugged Bette, painfully aware of her nipples calling for attention.

“Donna brought gifts!” Alice announced eager to see Bette’s face at her newly acquired sweatshirt.

“She did?”

“Maybe you should invite the family in Porter,” Alice suggested knowing Bette well enough to know the surprise interrupted an intimate moment. “You seem on edge Bette.”

“No,” Bette’s voice was an octave higher than normal. “I’m not on edge at all.”

“I hope we didn’t interrupt you since it took you so long to answer the damn door.”

“God damnit Alice!” Tina came stomping down the hallway in nothing but a t-shirt. “You have the absolute worst fucking timing of anyone I know. It’s like you have a sixth sense when Bette and I are about to…”

Tina turned the corner seeing a shocked Bette, her family, and an amused Alice smiling in her direction.

“Jesus!” Tina stepped back around the corner mortified at the current predicament she was in.

“Is this how they talk in LA these days?” Donna asked shocked at her daughter’s language. “Where Tina comes from that language would get your mouth washed out with soap.”

“Classic,” Alice leaned against the wall laughing at the scene playing before her eyes.

“Soap?” Bette asked.

“Ladies never swear or tell tales,” Donna explained as Tina struggled in the bedroom to pull her jeans over her hips and button them up.

“Mom!” Tina came running around the corner once more, but this time properly dressed. “I had no idea you were coming!”

“That was the point!” Donna squeezed Tina tightly, relishing in the feel of her daughter in her arms.

“I can’t believe you’re all here! How long are you staying?”

“We thought about a long weekend,” Donna began to explain but was quickly interrupted by Bette.

“This is a nice surprise, a long weekend with all of you is exactly what we need.”

“Well,” Donna began once more. “Those tickets were very expensive so we extended it to a week long trip to save money on the tickets! You have us here for a week!”

The look of shock that crossed Bette and Tina’s face was so amusing that Alice couldn’t help but snap a Polaroid picture quickly to capture their mouths gaping open.

“Classic,” Alice laughed quietly. “This can’t get any better!”