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Lest I Forget (15)
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“I was so nervous you weren’t going to like the office we made for you,” I told Alice after I’d taken a drink and rested my voice for a few minutes. She didn’t make any move to look at me, and for a minute I was worried. But then she did, and I saw the tears in her eyes.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, moving a little closer to her bed and taking her hand.
She made a sound that seemed to be pretty annoyed, and in spite of the fact that she was a little upset I started giggling anyway. “I’m sorry, I always forget about the open-ended questions. It’s not on purpose,” I said, trying to cheer her up a little bit. It didn’t work; the tears in her eyes just started to roll down her cheeks instead.
“Aw, baby, it’s okay,” I said, trying desperately to reassure her. It didn’t do much good. She was pissed at not being able to answer my questions unless they required a yes or no, and it made me really sad to see her so frustrated about it. “I didn’t mean to,” I told her in a whisper.
She took her hand out of mine and moved it a little jerkily to my face, where she moved her fingertips over my cheek. I understood this as her trying to tell me that it was all right, and the fact that she felt she needed to be reassuring me of that broke my heart. I took her hand and kissed her palm.
“Don’t feel sorry for me,” I told her. “I’m fine. You can be sad. Or angry or whatever you need to be. But don’t waste any energy feeling sorry for me.”
She looked back at me with defiance in her eyes and gave a tiny shrug, basically telling me it didn’t matter what I said. “Do you ever think it’s weird that I can understand you, even though you can’t talk?” I asked. I guess it didn’t really matter, but I found it a little curious that I always seemed to know what she meant when she couldn’t say a word.
She just blinked “no” at me like it was the dumbest question in the world. I suppose it was, in a way. We knew each other so well and had been together so long that I could detect the slightest variation in her scent when her mood changed, so I didn’t know why it surprised me that I knew what she was saying without using words.
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MT, you continue to do a beautiful job with their communication, deep understanding of each other and immense love for each other. It’s encouraging know that A had some limited movement . It was great to have Jenny and Shane there helping out D to understand what troubled A. Also felt very positive with their phone conversation. “An upgraded version of Jenny’s shed” , lmao. Oh, please let D rest longer. I do not want to see getting sick. Thank you for this update and remember school comes first.
No: I would not want to look at Betty all day in court. Woo hoo! What a great end to the week to get a new chapter from you!! It’s wonderful how the girls have such a close connection that they are able to overcome the communication issues. I laughed out loud at this: “…if I didn’t eat the food they were going to get one of their buff gay waiters to come kick my ass because it would make all three of them too tired.” You are doing a great job with the beginnings of Shenny. Poor Alice — it must be so hard for her to write about those things. I can see where she would be “off” and not want Dana to read it. I am so glad Alice liked the new office — of course, how could she not? I hope Dana gets a little more than the two hours sleep. Those hospital vigils can be so draining. Excellent chapter, as usual, MT!! Thank you so much!!!
Whoa! That was a pretty deep chapter. I have to echo most of MaGoose said…communication issues, the buff waiter, Alice dealing with the writing. Great stuff, it just shows us all how much they are REALLY meant to be together. Thanks A LOT for another outstanding chapter.