(Tina stood in the shower, the water raining down on her head as it bowed itself in resignation. She shed her tears and cried as the pressurized water literally drowned out the sounds of her falling spirit. When her wrinkled skin could endure no further moisture and her soul had hit bottom, she resigned herself to facing the rest of the day and the rest of her life. She had held Angelica for several moments after Myrrdin brought her back in. She held her tight…it was her only comfort to hold the other love of her life, the only one left. Not having let her emotions release though, was taking its toll, so she had Myrrdin take Angelica for the rest of day until she could find some peace. The shower had helped…but the superficial cleansing couldn’t quite take Tina’s inner demons into the drain as well. She grabbed a towel and dried off. She put on her robe and looked in the mirror at her beleaguered face. She didn’t always fancy herself, but her confidence was always bolstered by her lover, particularly, she recalled now, when they were together and looking at their reflections….her memory revisits a time in LA…

Tina is standing in a towel in front of the Porter-Kennard bathroom mirror. Bette, without covering, is closely behind her, with arms around Tina’s waist and lips adoring the side of Tina’s face.

TINA- “Hey Porter, I’ve gotta dry off.”

BETTE- “Not so fast Kennard.” (Bette places her arms around Tina’s and plants a quick kiss on her face.) “You’re so beautiful…I can’t stop looking at those eyes, that face…mmmm.”

TINA- (Her wet body is feeling the arousing sensation of what one touch from Bette could accomplish multiplied innumerably…her legs feel weakened and her skin awakens all over her body.) “Frisky this morning aren’t you?”

BETTE- (Looking at Tina’s eyes in the mirror and pushing her face up against Tina’s as they stare at one another she moans approvingly in reply and her movements provoke a moan of pleasure from her mate. She whispers…) “It’s Saturday…”

TINA- “I know but I have to go to…uhhhhh…I…ohhhh…have to…ahhh….” (Tina’s speech cannot survive the mere beginnings of Bette’s plans for the morning as Bette’s legs press up all along and against her own, and Bette’s naked form has her trapped between the sink and the mocha-skinned captor. Tina presses back up against Bette, causing her to stroke Tina’s arms in their movement outwards and stroke them as the tanned arms move under them and cradle what they had been blocking. Tina feels her most sensitive self harden and her breasts enliven…) “Ohhh Bette…” (From caressing the arms that cradled their favourite parts, Tina’s hands came down to grasp the sides of the sink. Bette let Tina’s towel stand the test of passion’s introduction, and taunted its staying power as her hands reached down to Tina’s upper legs…stroking them on the outside, on the front, towards the inner legs but below the hem of the towel, so as not to disturb the gems it hid. Tina was sighing and moaning at the taunting of Bette’s touches as Bette’s left hand grasped Tina’s left upper leg from the front and Bette’s right hand disappeared briefly only to return on the upper part of the towel covering Tina’s chest. Tina squirmed in delight. The towel was putting up a good fight as Bette’s right hand moved down and behind Tina’s right leg…rising with grasps of Tina’s skin and then raising the towel’s edges to assume possession of the right cheek where it meets the upper leg…Bette sank her finger into the crevice as she stroked it, coming closer to the inside of the leg and being met with the tension and resistance of Tina’s resulting movements and moans. The towel was beginning its descent, having failed despite its fortitude, and revealing first the perky bosom jiggling at attention. And as it fell along the fair-skinned territory, it would do so to sounds of intense accompaniment…as Bette’s left hand grasped the bosom’s mounds and her right hand enveloped Tina’s most hightened self and its liquid expression…and then finally thrust her passion with dedicated fury until the sounds of ecstasy were no more.)

(But in the present day, in San Francisco, Tina now looks in the hotel mirror, her face not quite so happy as it was in their home that day, nor joined by its favourite companion. She had reminisced and regretted it now, as her present stood in such stark contrast to that other time she gazed in the mirror and saw her better self. Tina’s saddened eyes almost darkened at viewing her ‘today’. She opened the slightly closed bathroom door and walked into the rest of the suite. She moved the towel about her hair to dry it as she walked to the bed in the master bedroom and then froze before reaching its edge.)

BETTE- (Numb as she gazes on her former mate…) “Myrrdin let me in. She took Angie out. I asked her to not return until you called but she said she’d call you in an hour to make sure it’s ok with you. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I…”

TINA- (Stoic but her chest has tightened at the site…) “What do you want? What are you doing here? Didn’t you get in enough condemnation the first time around?”

BETTE- “I’m sorry. I’ll go if you want. I needed to come back. I needed…we need to finish this conversation.”

TINA- “You did a good job of killing it earlier. What could you possibly have to add?”

BETTE- “Everything I didn’t say.”

TINA- “I don’t want to hear it.”

BETTE- “I need to say it.”

TINA- “I don’t care.”

BETTE- “I doubt that.”

TINA- “Please leave.”

BETTE- “No.”

TINA- “What?!”

BETTE- “I can’t take this either anymore. I’ve never been so confused…well no, wait, there was the ‘I have feelings for men’ pronounced by my lover, which I have to say threw me for a considerable loop, but hey…this is really just an extension of that little revelation.”

TINA- “Get out!” (She tried to move away…)

BETTE- “Tina please…please…”

TINA- “You can’t be serious!”

BETTE- (She barely touches her arm, but it causes Tina to stop. Bette pulls back her hands.) “Please…”

TINA- “No.” (She grunts.) “Turn around!” (Bette looks at her confused.) “I have to change…turn around.” (Bette turns. Tina grabs some clothing, releases the robe and dresses herself. Bette’s eyes are closed as she awaits permission to turn.) “You’ve got some nerve coming here at all. You really…Bette I can’t believe you. After all we’ve been through to mend our friendship and then you come barging in like some arrogant estranged spouse and lecture me on living my life and your rights and how…you’ve moved on. Well, congratulations. I’m not here to serve as an audience for every mean thing you can think of to say to me. What right Bette? By what right?” (Tina looks at the back of Bette’s head…) “Bette?”

BETTE- “What?”

TINA- “Are you ignoring me? You barged your way in here to insult me?”

BETTE- “Oh…are you clothed?”

TINA- (Tina rolls her eyes a bit…) “YES.” (Bette turns as Tina regales her some more…) “Honestly Bette…”

BETTE- “I didn’t think I could have a relationship after you but I found someone who made me feel good again.”

TINA- (She’s angry…) “Why exactly did you come back? Is there a new point you want to make or are you just going to tell me how wonderfully things are going for you? Bette I know that…I’ve been telling you this past while how happy I am for you and for how things were between us. I don’t understand why you’re here. What the hell do you want from me?”

BETTE- “Tina please…” (Tina sighs in anger and sits on the bed. Bette faces her.) “I don’t want you to leave LA.”

TINA- “You already said that. And I expect to hear from Joyce Wishnia soon…”

BETTE- “I…”

TINA- “You have NO right to say those things you did. How dare you accuse me of planning all this just to take Angie away!”

BETTE- “Tina that’s not what I meant.”

TINA- “Why are you here?!”

BETTE- “I don’t want you to leave LA.”

TINA- “Bette I told you I might look into work in another city but that you’d always have Angelica in your life. I even considered giving you primary custody if I couldn’t find the right arrangement. Then San Francisco came up and it allowed enough freedom with the logistics. I can’t do this anymore…”

BETTE- “My God, you were going to give up Angie?”

TINA- “I’m not doing this again. I don’t want to…”

BETTE- “Tina no…I don’t want you to go.”

TINA- “Are you not listening to me? I’m so damn desperate to get some happiness and a life back that I’ll do anything…”

BETTE- “TINA…please…I want you to stay in LA. You don’t need to do this.”

TINA- “DAMN IT Bette…you’ll get to see her as often as before and maybe even more. WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!”

BETTE- (She takes hold of Tina’s upper arms…Tina braces herself to fight her off…) “I WANT YOU TO STAY. I DON’T WANT YOU TO LEAVE LA.”

TINA- (She shakes her head…) “I…don’t understand…”

BETTE- “Tina… I want YOU to stay. I NEED YOU to stay. YOU Tina, not just Angelica…YOU.”

TINA- “Why Bette? Why on earth would you want me to stay? You have a full life now…you made it painfully clear…you’ve moved on…what the hec difference does it make?”

BETTE- “Every difference in the world. Look what we’ve been through and what we’ve accomplished to be a part of each other’s lives with Angelica. You want to destroy that? Don’t you understand?” (Her voice is cracking a bit…) “I want you to be a part of my life…not in another city, whether it’s an hour’s plane ride or 10 hours…I want you to be a real part of my life.”

TINA- (She’s shaking her head…and her thoughts are racing…) “WHY? You’ve moved on. We both have, though I obviously haven’t done such a thorough job of it. A part of your life? What do I look like an ornament? A sidekick? I’m not your ‘background’ girl. This is ridiculous! And I don’t understand…Bette what exactly did Jodie think of you prancing off to San Francisco?” (Bette freezes…a bit thrown by the question…) “Bette? Oh, right, she probably agrees with you that having Angie live in the same city is your right.” (Bette isn’t sure what to say and feel uncomfortable. Tina looks at Bette…) “Bette? Isn’t that right? She probably even wants you to fight for custody, although I’d be surprised…she seems rational, though…” (Tina’s feeling suspicious…) “Bette…how does Jodie feel about you wanting me around?” (Bette swallows…) “Bette?!”

BETTE- “She…we…she broke up with me…we’re just going to take some time…”

TINA- “OK…get out!” (She rises from the bed.) “NOW.”

BETTE- “Tina no, it’s not like that.”

TINA- “You …you…ugh…out…get out…”

BETTE- “Jodie has nothing to do with this.”

TINA- “Yeah, and apparently neither do I! It’s all about Bette Porter!”

BETTE- “No no no Tina…I thought it was about Angelica but…”

TINA- “…it’s about Bette instead…go figure!”

BETTE- (She moves closer…) “NO Tina…listen to me! Tina, for God’s sake, please listen to me…I found out about the nature of your trip here only after Jodie left.”

TINA- (She looks at Bette.) “Bette, you’ve been making love to her all this time. You’ve been in a relationship with her all these months…in her bed, her in yours, and taking steps to move in together. Only a couple of days after this you’re coming here and telling me you want me to be a part of your life? After telling me you’ve moved on and only care about Angelica? What is this? You feel sorry for me? My confession struck a sympathy nerve?”

BETTE- (Her voice strengthens…) “Oh give me a break. Tina, I’ve seen the way you’ve looked at me these past weeks. Surely you’ve picked up on my own disposition towards you. Everyone has seen the ‘whatever’ it is you want to call it between us that stirs up whenever we’re in the same room together let alone in close proximity. You KNOW what the mere sight of you does to me, whether I choose to acknowledge it or not. You KNOW I can love no other person in this world as long as I live as I love you…if it’s one thing you know as well as I do, even when all else in the world is in doubt, surely you know all THAT. Stop your pain Tina? And what? What have I felt? What torture have I not endured since losing you after Provocations and losing you all over again after your ‘feelings’ were in transition or whatever? What emptiness have I not sensed deep down after making love to Jodie, who has been nothing but absolutely wonderful to me and re-awoken me? I could fall for millions of women Tina, but I can’t be in love with any of them…ever…I’m beholden to only one and ‘moving on’ has been a laughable euphemism for enduring a life without you in my bed. So, stop your self-righteous chant and give me a friggin break. Damn it…” (Exhausted in a way, she sits on the bed and wipes the tears from her face.)

TINA- (Her voice milder…) “Why didn’t you say this when you first came here?”

BETTE- “I don’t know. Maybe because you didn’t tell me the truth about why you really wanted to come here…you didn’t tell me until just before I left the room the first time.”

TINA- “Why did you leave?”

BETTE- “Because you told me what I’ve been wanting to hear from you since after we lost the baby…and to hear it now, suddenly, in an unexpected moment after I had fought in vain all this time to rid myself of both the need to hear those words from you and the desperate need to say very much the same to you…it’s just…it’s too much…”

TINA- (She looks at Bette.) “There’s a huge chasm between my feelings for you and translating that into a life together again. Recently, I was beginning to think it was more than a chasm…more like an impossibility. I think I was running as much from that as much as the feelings themselves. It hurts to be outside your life and not a part of it. These past weeks, with everything being so much better between us, I felt like I was falling in love with you all over again, and to see you with someone else…well… I felt like I had lost you and nothing could change it.”

BETTE- “I couldn’t bear it when I saw you with someone else. Months ago, I looked through our window as I arrived at the house and saw you in his embrace… I don’t think much of anything else could have inflicted more pain on me.”

TINA- “Seems we’ve exchanged a lot of pain over the past couple of years or so.”

BETTE- “I read the other night on this website about the awesome responsibility that weighs on you when you realize that you’re holding someone’s heart in your hands.”

TINA- (Tina turns to look at her. She takes her hand in her own as they sit there for a while.) “It’s time for you to go.”

BETTE- “What do you mean?”

TINA- “Time for you to get back to your life. I’ve got stuff to do here. I should be back tomorrow night.” (Bette looks at her with trepidation. Tina kisses her hand.) “Bette…” (Tina pauses and looks at Bette in the eyes for a moment…) “I don’t know what…I…I’ll see you back in LA.” (Tina grasps Bette’s shoulder lightly…) “You’ve exhausted me Porter.” (Bette leans in and kisses her on the cheek, causing a wave of warmth in Tina that provokes a blush.)

BETTE- (Whispering…) “I’m sorry. All the anger… I’m so sorry.”

TINA- “I know. Moving to San Francisco without discussing it with you wasn’t exactly the best idea…”

BETTE- “Did you really think it wouldn’t phase me?”

TINA- “I don’t know. On one level you seemed to be progressing with Jodie and I felt like I had to do it. It really hurt to be experiencing all those feelings lately and feel my heart being ripped out because I couldn’t fulfill them. I didn’t want to ruin what you had with her either. On the other hand I guess somewhere deep down I was hoping it would totally phase you…I guess it was the least courageous thing I’ve done in recent memory.”

BETTE- “What do you mean?”

TINA- “I put everything in your hands. I left the decision to you in a way…didn’t I? It’s almost like I didn’t want to make the choice or perhaps I had made it and couldn’t face it.”

BETTE- (She looks at her a little confused at the question, but then thinks she understands…) “You didn’t know Jodie and I weren’t doing too well. I think you were sacrificing a lot by not talking to me sooner.”

TINA- “If I had the strength, I guess would’ve been able to accept it and move on while still living in LA.”

BETTE- (She smiles…) “Move on? From me? Well Gee T, no one can expect you to be superhuman…”

TINA- (She pretend smacks her on the arm…)

BETTE- “Ouch! Hey!” (Bette strikes back…)

TINA- “You know beating each other senseless with foam batons would have been far more constructive instead of all the pain we’ve caused one another.”

BETTE- “Agreed.”

TINA- “Ok, time to go.” (They both stand and head for the door. Tina stops her just after Bette opens the door and touches her arm.) “I’ll see you when I get back. I love you.”

BETTE- (She kisses her on the cheek…) “I love you. Bye.” (The door closes. Tina turns and leans on the door, her head resting up against it with her eyes closed.)

(That night Bette was sitting on a chair near the pool with a glass of wine in hand. Alice was in the chair next to her.)

ALICE- “Just take it slow.”

BETTE- “I wasn’t planning on rushing things Al.”

ALICE- “I know, I’m just sayin…” (She looks at her.) “What’s wrong?”

BETTE- “Nothing, what do you mean?”

ALICE- “You seem a little too pensive…too quiet.”

BETTE- “It feels unreal. It’s weird, like the last two years have been a bad dream. Not to mention that I ended another relationship the other day. It’s not exactly a small event. Jodie and I had become close. But it just wasn’t meant to be.”

ALICE- “Jodie knew.”

BETTE- “I guess it wasn’t that difficult to pick up on it.”

ALICE- “Nope…pretty damn clear as day if you ask me!” (Bette smiles. The doorbell rings.) “I’ll get it.” (Alice goes to the door, looks through the peep hole and opens the door.)

JOYCE- “Hi there. Is Bette home?”

ALICE- “Yeah. She’s in the back. She expecting you?”

JOYCE- “No. I hope I’m not interrupting.”

ALICE- “No…everything ok?”

JOYCE- “I need to talk to Bette.”

ALICE- “Ok, follow me.” (The head to the pool. Bette sees Joyce Wishnia and looks a little surprised.)

BETTE- “Joyce? Hi.”

JOYCE- “I’m sorry to interrupt and I wouldn’t normally drop in like this, but I was on my way home from the office and I figured I best come by instead of doing this over the phone.”

BETTE- “Do what?”

ALICE- “Excuse me, I’ll let you two talk. I’ll be in the kitchen Bette.”

JOYCE- “Actually Alice, I’d prefer you stayed if that’s alright with you Bette…”

BETTE- “What’s going on?”

JOYCE- “I got served with papers. It seems Ms. Kennard wants to amend the custody agreement.”

BETTE- “No I think she may have taken steps earlier but we talked today and I really don’t think she’d be taking any steps involving custody.”

JOYCE- “Well THAT’S interesting, because I just got served with papers from her lawyer…just before I left the office tonight, via facsimile. The papers are dated today’s date.” (Alice looks at Joyce and then at Bette, as Bette shakes her head slightly and looks at Joyce.)