The news was startling. Had she really given up the one job that she loved? I looked across at Bette trying to process the news. We were on our way home from having dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant. Dinner was good, as usual and Evan was hyper, not usual. She made plans to do plenty of things with Bette, some of which I was included. She talked non-stop. I was grateful. Bette laughed and agreed to do anything Evan wanted.

“Tina, say something, please.”

I continued to stare at her.

“You havent said anything about me quitting.”

I remained quiet.

“Tee?”

Her breathing quickened and she became restless. Hands moving all around the steering wheel unable to keep still.

“Look, I think I made the right decision.”

“Not an abrupt one? You sure you wont regret quitting…lets say by next week. When you get tired of staying home.”

“I dont understand, Tina. One minute youre yelling at me for working so many hours, ignoring you and Evan. I quit and now you complaining about me being home.”

“Get it straight Bette, Im complaining about you making a rushed decision. You see that girl back there,” I pointed to the backseat at Evan asleep listening to her Ipod, “youve got her believing that everything is going to change.”

“What are you talking about? It will.”

“Bette, cut the bullshit. Youll be involved with Evan for a week and then youll get bored…antsy. And then youll focus on something else. Leaving your daughter back where she started… competing for your attention again.”

I shifted in the passenger seat looking out the window. There was nothing that she could say to prove me wrong. I knew Bette. I knew Bette better than she knew herself.

*****

I know I wished for her to be there, I prayed her for her to acknowledge me but never thought she would do what she did.

I walked into the lunchroom, over to our table… Maddie was going on and on about something her cousin did. I really wasnt paying attention, to busy gawking at Lindsey making out with Alison Parkerson. Another girl! Another girl! I couldnt believe she was… I couldnt believe she was kissing her. Her! Of all people! The ***** girl in school. Not to mention, Lindsey told me she wasnt sure she liked girls… she just liked me. I mean, I understood. We were all confused at this age… some of us tried it and some of us didnt. But to see her kissing another girl broke my heart. I stupidly and selfishly thought I was the only one.

“Hey, Ev… whats going…” India started.

The crew followed my gaze to the back of the lunchroom and saw her.

“Damn, Evan. Im so sorry,” Maddie said.

“That *****! She cant do that to you,” India said standing up.

“Sit down, India. She can do whatever she wants to. Shes not my girl anymore,” I sighed sitting next to them.

“You sure, cause I can go slap Alison or something for you.”

“Nah… thats okay. Ive already forgotten about her.”

“Good, she isnt worth your worries anyway,” Stacy said throwing her arm around my shoulders.

At that point I had erased all memories of Lindsey from my brain.