Suddenly aware of the silent tears cascading down her face Tina quickly moved the letter away from her not wanting to smudge Dana’s tender words.  She gently laid it on the table and looked up to take in the faces of those around her.  Shane had her arm protectively around Alice’s shoulders and as Tina started to again become aware of her surroundings she heard the gentle sobs the writer was so desperately trying to contain.  A single tear kept forming in the corner of Shane’s eye which she would angrily rub away only for it to reform once again.

She heard Helena before she saw her.  A long sad sigh drawing Tina’s attention to a face which was staring into the distance appearing utterly lost. Tina sensed this woman needed comforting but felt in no position to offer it herself and was relieved to see the reassuring arms of the older Porter sibling come to rest around Helena’s shoulders as they rested their heads against each other. 

Next Tina looked over to Jenny and for the first time in many months she saw the young vulnerable girl that she and Bette had first befriended over the garden hedge.  She looked wounded, regretful and for the first time in a long time uncertain.  Next to her Max had covered her hand with his own and was gazing at her wistfully apparently unsure as to what level of contact was appropriate in offering comfort now that their relationship had changed so much.  Finally Tina allowed herself to look at Bette.

Having received the original strength to read the letter from what she found in Bette’s eyes, Tina knew that the resolve she had shown to make it through without stopping was about to desert her.  She knew that when she looked at Bette after all these years even despite all the obstacles that still remained between them in this moment, where there was no energy left for putting up her defences that Bette would look in her eyes and see her pain and that that would disarm her completely.   What she didn’t expect however was what she saw in Bette’s eyes.

As Bette met her gaze, Tina was sure that she saw love.  Not the platonic love that they had both now learnt to feel safe displaying for each other as they transitioned into their new roles of co-parents both involved in their own personal relationships.  Nor was it the look of lust that Tina had grown familiar with over the years she’d spent with Bette.  Instead, it was the look that when Tina had first seen it over a decade ago she had immediately attributed to reflecting the kind of love that only soul- mates share.  It made Tina feel safe and protected.  It made her feel powerful and confident.  It reaffirmed her belief in humanity, but most of all it made her feel loved – truly, unconditionally without reservation or question, loved.