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    The Adventures Of Bette Porter And Sissee Gardner After Yale (Part 3, Chapter 11)

    The Adventures Of Bette Porter And Sissee Gardner After Yale (Part 3, Chapter 11)

    PART THREE: MENDOCINO, CALIFORNIA

    Chapter 11

    The French would call it, “l’heure bleu” – the blue hour, that time between darkness and dawn. I awakened then, on Sunday morning, much before Bette opened her eyes. I was laying on my side and she was laying behind me with one arm draped over me. I could feel her warm breath on my neck and I could hear her breathing in and out.

    I had to go to the bathroom so I gently pulled myself away from her and got out of bed to do my thing.

    When I came back, she had moved. She was flat on her back with her head on a pillow. I looked at her with admiration and affection. She was in a deep sleep. Her mouth was a little slack and her bountiful hair was scattered all over the pillow. It was a pretty sight.

    I wanted to ask her, “Where are we going Bette? Where is this relationship going to take us? Do we just let ourselves go and take one day at a time or do we sit down and create a plan?”

    I know I learned something this weekend about being with a woman. The protocol was very different than being with a man. Where ever Bette and I go, we will not be able to do it holding hands publicly. We will not be able to dance just anywhere, or kiss on the mouth or physically express our love in anyway if anonymous people are around. It was 1985 then and I wondered if things would ever change.

    I thought about Howie and I. I thought about the times he and I had walked hand in hand and no one batted an eye. We had danced publicly and only drew smiles. We could kiss anytime and anywhere and no one ever yelled hateful, evil or disparaging remarks. Bette was right. I had not thought into it. There was a big difference and it did not seem fair.

    I laid back down on the bed and made myself face the situation. I willed myself to think it through. I really and truly was in love with her. I had never been in love with anyone else before. The only thing I knew about love was what I learned in a psychology class. The lesson was that love was intimacy, commitment and passion.

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    Comments

    1. Wow, the tangled webs we weave. I hope Bette doesn’t run for the hills, she usually stands her ground. But since Sissie wasn’t totally truthful, she might. But I hope not. These two are too good together. what a great chapter.

    2. Who, in their right mind, would give a seond thought about grabbing Bette Porter off the market if they had a chance? Sissee, I think your younger self has some sort of delusional disorder happening. Howie? Howie? Girl, what were you smoking?

    3. this is so making me curious how everything will develop. you gave a hint that maybe they are no longer together (Through the last twenty years I went back just once but I was with someone else.) It somehow hurts.

    4. Yes, I too would like to know what happened to separate them in the future. Was it because Sissee couldn’t handle being in a lesbian relationship in the controversial 80’s? What is Howie doing at her house with all the lights on? Great chapter! PPS!!

    5. techgal, No, the shit hitting the fan is not more graceful happening in Newport Beach, just perhaps cooler because of those ocean breezes!

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