It has been nearly a week since me and Dana got back together. Joan is arriving tomorrow and i am completely happy and even more so when Dana arrives home from training.

“Hey baby, how was training?”

“Um good, yeah, hard you know.”

“Yeah. Dana are you ok?”

“Yeah, its just um, i think we should you know talk.”

“Ah, the talk.”

“We dont have to, its just i think if our relationship is to move forward we should talk about what went wrong the last time.”

“Your right, it is about time we talked. Come on.”(they walk to the couch)

We sit facing each other on the couch. Dana has her head bowed, playing with her hands. She does this everytime she’s nervous and i find it incredibly endearing. Even at 30 she has the most child like qualities i have ever seen. At the minute i must admit to not being much better. I’ve been dreading this conversation from the moment we got back together. Believe me when i say i want our relationship to become stronger, but when i open up thats it. Theres no going back or erasing anything thats said. After this Dna will know everything about me. The good, the bad and the very ugly.

“Oh god Dana, this is so hard. I dont know what you want to hear.”

“Alice, why is your biggest insecurity that you think people will leave you?”

“Because they always do.”

“Alice, how can you say that. I mean we’ve been with you for 8 years doesnt that count for anything.”

“Dana friends are different and really if you think about it, you did leave me and in a way so did Bette.”

“Bette.”

“Yeah, look im not saying i was in love with Bette because honestly i wasnt. Its just we were getting closer and i began to think we could be something and then she left. Although we stayed friends it was still a constant reminder that i wasn’t good enough.”

“Alice, you ARE good enough.”

“Am i, i mean look at my history. My dad left when i was 10….”

“He died Alice, he didnt intentionally leave you.”

“Logically, i know that but to a 10 year old its not that simple to understand. No one ever explained. My mum was barely there and when she was she practically ignored me. It made me think that maybe it was my fault he left.”