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The Thawing of the Ice – Chapter Thirty-Six
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Chapter Thirty-Six
After hanging up with Tina, Bette finally checked her email. She didn’t know what she expecting with Helena still being airborne, but she did feel sad when there wasn’t a reply. She’d gotten used to this cycle between the three of them; Tina winding her up and Helena winding her down.
“Helena”, she whispered, remembering the feel of her best friend’s lips. Reliving the scent of Helena’s hair and the feel of her body.
Those thoughts made her shiver and though she felt guilty for thinking them with Tina’s innermost thoughts sitting beside her, she couldn’t fight what she felt. She hoped that dinner with Tina combined with Helena’s absence would give her some clarity.
The days passed quickly and before she was ready for it, Friday evening had arrived. Shane and Carmen had agreed to watch Angelica. Bette had picked up her daughter from preschool and gotten her ready for her big night out with Auntie Shane and Auntie Carmen.
Bette picked up her little love bundle and planted kisses on the soft cheeks. “I love you, Boo. Have a good time with your Aunties. Just remember, no wild parties and no drinking beer.” She held her closely and inhaled the scents of baby powder and lotion. She’d missed her little boo and she had to stop herself from cancelling and wanting to spend the night with just Angie.
In the end, she marched next door and was greeted warmly by Carmen. “Hey you little cutie!” she teased a giggling Angelica.
“Is that my Angie-Poo?” asked Shane, joining them at the door.
Bette was happy to see the two of them together. She smiled broadly and she said, “You guys are the best. She’s been fed and her diaper’s been changed. She and I already discussed it, but just so you know…no wild parties for her and no beer either.”
Carmen chuckled. “You got it Mama Porter. No wild fun for Angelica.”
“I guess we need to cancel that keg”, said Shane.
“What are you going to do with her?” Bette asked Carmen, referring to Shane.
“I’m still working on it. Let me know if you have any bright ideas”, Carmen replied.
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I am so confused with this story. Everyone grows, as the years pass, suppose to be a good thing. Not so sure here
my only thought after i finished reading this chapter was “f**k”
I really don’t enjoy this Bette.
I don’t know what’a happening here. I feel like Bette’s comparing Tina to Helena but I could be wrong. Sigh! Thank you for this story.
Perfect! Now we just need Helena to return home so they can explore their feelings further. It’s a bit odd picturing Bette having a panic attack and being celibate (WTF?) but hey I’m gonna stick with it & hope that Belena end up happily together. PPS
Another great chapter!! The interaction was authentic …and B has a real qwandry…if it doesn’t fit, do you force it or should you let it go…PPS
I think that Tina should not expect for Bette to jump back in her arms right after she left Henry. Tina needs to figure some things out of her own. I have no interest in seeing Bette and Helena together but whatever it takes for Bette to gain more stability. I don’t like this Tina because Bette is giving her most all of the warning signs that her heart is not there and Tina keeps persuing her anyway. This is just another example of Tina being selfish. She can sense that there is someone else but insists on her own way. Tina would be better off backing away and giving Bette sometime.
One more thought maybe Tina wants to fight as hard as for Bette as Bette fought for her. However the difference is I think Bette knew that Tina still loved her. It was romantic and pain wrenching to see Bette fight of Tina but this is just pathetic what Tina is doing and I think deep down inside she knows it.
Not liking this Bette playing with Tina like this. It was Bette who cheated first. Tina is doing all she can to make up for her actions while getting over the hurt Bette caused her. Free Tina from this Woman.
Bette please get your head together and be honest with Tina and tell her you were thinking about her having sex with Henry in that bed. Tina could probably tell her that Henry had not been in that bed, they just had sex at his house. Bette needs to get over all this and get helena out of her mind. She is thinking too much of what if and not about what she has in front of her. She should have been honest with Tina. Hope Tina continues to push her to talk about what she is feeling. I think this is the only way Bette will feel better about any interactions with Tina. All she had to do was ask Tina if henry had been in that bed with her. A wimpy indecisive Bette is very unattractive. I keep thinking that I might need to skip the rest of the story until the end and go back and read the rest if it turns out to favor a Bette and Tina relationship. I thought I just about had this thing figured out but now I’m not sure. Thanks for posting.
Some people have it. You have “it” in your writing. Right now, I am as confused as Bette. She obviously doesn’t want to be w/Tina. How sad. Too bad that Candace was engaged b/c Bette definitely needs an outlet for her desires. If she starts up w/Tina then she has set her mark and can’t become sexually involved w/Helena. Tina wouldn’t allow Bette to be close friends w/Helena. She’d be too jealous and insecure.I don’t blame her either. Great story but sad for TiBetters.
Well, they certainly got dressed up, but they obviously didn’t have a good time. That little loop of questions and mental images about Tina and Henry that brought Bette into a panic attack? I’d imagine Tina had pretty much the same mental anguish wondering about Bette and Candace. And who’s to say that Tina didn’t “learn” the things she’s saying from Helena, not Henry? Bette has a lot of issues regarding her ex. She’s not comfortable with her, she maybe never will be, but she at least needs to start dealing with how she feels or doesn’t feel about Tina instead of running all the time. She’s got to co-parent with this woman for the rest of Angelica’s childhood… Therapy might be an option, not with a view to them getting back together, but just to help them sort whatever it is that’s making Bette so anxious all the time. thanks for the post. :)
Well said jp22!
I was just reading a tiff_duke story ‘I Need You Here -15’ and I hope she doesn’t mind if I quote a line from it. “I think it’s time to bring in the professionals.” “I’ve made an appointment,” Bette agreed. “Therapy.” … I think a therapist is the next phone call Bette needs to make instead of wishing Helena was there. Is she really going to tell Helena that she attempted to have sex with Tina and had a panic attack because of visions of Henry. If Helena can coach her through that then I will have renewed respect for her. Interesting ‘fun date’, but at least now Bette has her answers. Images of Henry getting in the way of sex with Tina is an interesting revelation. I guess since Bette has forgiven Helena everything to do with Tina she won’t have any trouble being intimate with her without images of Tina getting in the way. I wonder if Helena will feel the same way when Bette leads her to the bedroom. Bette’s heart and body knows what it wants – now all she has to do is tell Tina to ‘step off’ so she can have her happily ever after with ‘crystal blue eyes’. Prolonging the inevitable is just causing a lot of unnecessary angst. Can’t wait to see what you have in store for us next MTS. Thanks for posting
Tina and Bette having been/being lovers with the same woman (Helena Peabody) is just all kinds of wrong. It’s almost …incestuous! Stop the presses, hold your horses. I don’t think Bette has to go back to Tina after the stunts she has pulled, but let Bette keep Helena as a new friend. She could always use a good friend and cook. Thanks!
Someone needs to shoot those pigs down from the sky right bloody quick!!!! This has got to be the most pathetic Bette EVER!!!!! Talk about a disfunctional. She needs that shrink big time because even though she may feel love and feel calm with Helena around its almost beyond desperate and obsessional dependence. Grasping on to her like a love sick puppy imprinted by its mother. Maybe everyone’s right, the aliens have finally taken over. Crap.
ok. so amongst all the confusion from the comments, i have to say, 99.9999% of the time i am always on board for anything about a tina and bette relationship, but i am not feelin’ it here. i think bette should follow her heart and step up and be true to tina. the method in which you explore bette and helena’s “new” relationship has me excited. bette “needs”(for lack of a better term), some new adventures in her life. what her heart is telling her and the signals she is feeling on instinct; “listening” to her inner feelings, will i feel, lead her to helena. i say, go follow the signals bette! clarify the doubts and step up and tell tina the truth about how you feel. bette doing what is right for her mental and physical well being is what matters now. i can “see” bette starting a new page in her life with helena. good gosh! let’s avoid the drama this time around and have the true soul mates begin to walk towards each other. bette and helena are two wandering souls who have to find their way back to each other. this is only going to get, “greater”! thanks for taking the time to post for us and i look forward to reading more.(oopsie on any typos)
Great chap! Now Tina fans got the kiss and little more;) but looover how realistic you are in your writings…people can forgive but never forget. and think Bette’s being the most honest she can at this moment, because she doesn’t understand herself. she doesn’t know what, how to feel. after soo much time with Tina think it’s very strange and confusing to be so familiar with her and ‘them’ nbut feel different and see how they changed. Anyway, love realism in the story, love the balance you always find – giving us drama and each to their own;)) Tnx for posting regularly and keep it that way;)
I don’t care what anyone says, one of my favorite fics hands down. I love what you’re doing. Keep it up :)
Well that ‘fun’ date went downhill pretty soon. Bette telling Tina with her actions as well as words that she is nowhere near being at ease with her and Tina pushing Bette’s boundaries constantly without listening what Bette was trying to tell her was hard to read. I wonder what would happen if Bette ever learns that Tina and Henry had sex in Bette and Tina’s bedroom if just the thought of Tina with Henry in Tina’s apartment gets such a reaction from Bette. In addition it makes sense to me that Bette thinks that Tina ‘learned’ what she’s saying from Henry and not from Helena, as they got together after Tina was with Helena and she wasn’t talking like that, so for me Bette’s making a logical conclusion. Either way if Tina and everybody else, including Helena, continues to push Bette into a relationship with Tina it will be a disaster. Bette needs time to sort out her feelings, if its by going to therapy, but please no Dan Foxworthy, or by doing it with the help of her friends or Helena, doesn’t matter. But I do know that they both need to sit down and talk about their past and then what they expect in the future before they even think about dating each other. Also it would be good for Tina to make sure that she really wants to be together with this ‘new’ Bette, and that she is okay with the changes Bette went though because she is not the same person Tina was together with for 7 years, not sure Tina is really aware of that or took the time to take it into consideration. Thanks for another wonderful and emotional chapter.
The fun date didn’t turn out to be fun after all. Bette should follow her heart and that heart leads to Helena. I honestly feel so sorry for the two of them. I just can’t beleive Bette won’t open up and talk to Tina about her feeling’s, Tina gave her the oppourtunity to sit and talk but Bette just can’t wait to get away from Tina fast enough. Will pigs now begin to fly.. I wonder? People change, Tina has changed so much she is stronger, she is communicating, she is showing and letting Bette know how she feels about her but I feel it is all in vain. Bette on the other hand is moving forward getting stronger but when it comes to Tina, I feel she is taking so many steps back and she is not being honest with herself, she is saying one thing to Tina and her inner most thoughts say something else, that is not healthy and not fair to either of them. I just want Bette to start being honest with her thoughts and have a conversation with Tina and tell her she does not feel the same way about her anymore, she may love her but she is not in love with her anymore. Let them move forward with their lifes and be amazing co parents to Angelica. Thank you!
I find it insulting that Bette had a panic attack while making out w/ Tina. The roller coaster feeling, hot and cold treatment with Tina is very confusing and tiring. Chapter 27 talk (if I’m right), Tina pour her soul to Bette about how she felt when she lost the baby and Bette’s cheating. Bette was crying because she realized how her cheating affected Tina and broke their marriage. Apologized for the pain she had caused the only woman she loved. Then she went back from being a distant cold hearted Bette to tina and turned to have dinner w/ helena for the conversation if I may qoute, “”And in those last few months with Tina, I packed all of me away. I hardly recognized myself. I was a puppet on her string. I was so insecure and lonely. I never want to feel that way again. And I’m angry with myself for letting her behavior drive my self-esteem into the ground. It was probably the darkest period of my life. And I’m still angry with her for causing it. “Did she really cause it, Bette?” “No, she didn’t. But I can’t stop blaming her.” In Chapter 36, after reading Tina’s innermost thoughts, she was crying and felt how hurt Tina felt. Bette felt super sweet inviting Tina to “fun” dinner, that ended up losing her appetite and thinking of someone else. Then testing if Tina taste as sweet as her current fling and felt good that it aroused her while making out w/ Tina. Then all of a suddden, had a panic attack because she is thinking of Henry of all the people. Isn’t she supposed to think of who’se she kissing?. I dont know, I am terribly confused with Bette’s indecisive and full of insecurities. I dont feel any vibes that Tina and Bette have another shot in this story, because of the way bette is behaving indifferent to Tina and super sweet w/ helena. Flashabck on Bette/kit conversation. Bette want her forever with someone who she can travel around. Well, Helena’s new job is to travel a lot, so, there you go, the “hint” that this will end as a Bette helena story and am a Tibbete fan…. I hoe Tina will find a someone who whe will love her and have another baby to prove to beete she is no longer the one she wanted to have a child with. Maybe one of Bette’s exes. what would be bette’s reaction. Bette doesn’t fit to be tina’s partner anymore. she can go with her art with helena.
So i took a pry and read when i saw the R rating, now am sorry that i did. I understand that its your story, but reading this story, it doesn’t feel like the characters that i know at all. Bette being so dependent on Helena for feeling emotionally secure, just doesn’t ring true to me. It’s very hard for me to identify with this “Bette” character portrayal After reading this chapter, there is no way i want Tina to be “Bette”, because Tina deserves more than what this “Bette” has to offer.Now i know that when if i see NC-17, i won’t have to read, because i know it be. All the best with your story.
Dear MTS, I respect you as a writer and thank you for contributing to the site. However, if you would dangle tibette for us right to the very end of this belena story I would take it bad. You must understand that many readers here are invested in their favorite couple and it is a disregard for their feelings when you try to draw them in in the hope that there’s a future for their ship in your story. That many are losing sleep and strands of hair with this story is a testament to your writing ability. I tried to stay away but I couldn’t until I’m sure there is no hope for tibette. I know this is a Belena, but until you are more forthright with us about this I can’t help peeking. I never touch a Belena fic because I’m no fan of self-flogging, but you’ve reeled me in and I want out. Please have a heart.
I’m still here reading and I have to say I think Bette is being a sneaky bitch to Tina. She’s known Tina for over 8yrs. and she acts like she doesn’t know her at all. She’s doing all this thinking about Helena and thinking about how Helena understands her and calms her down. How could she forget Tina did the very same for her for over 7yrs? I don’t like how she wanted to “road test” Tina to see if her feelings were still there. She would hate Tina and flip her lid if Tina did that to her. I guess she forgot she was the one to actually tell Tina to go be with a man in the first place. This is just wrong on so many levels. I can’t believe she doesn’t see how wrong she is for the way she’s treating Tina right now. Why couldn’t she just tell Tina, I’m not there yet, b/c I’ve developed feelings for Helena? If she’s changed so much why can’t she tell Tina the truth? No, she’d rather lie to her and string her along. I’m still trying to rap my head around the “wonderful friendship” she developed over night with Helena. Ya know the women who tried to destroy her? She obviously doesn’t care for Tina anymore and is now just being down right cruel to her. She needs to quit playing games. Thanks for posting.
Tina is being so open and honest while Bette is not . Bette wants a platonic relationship w/Tina. TiBette is no more in your story. If Candace was not engaged, Bette would’ve fucked her seven ways to Sunday. She just wants a fresh relationship even though Helena treated her like shit, she’s drawn to her. It will be difficult for Bette to co-parent w/Tina if Helena and Bette have a intimate relationship. Tina will always resent Helena being in their lives. They all need to chill and Bette needs to find a therapist before she goes further with anyone in a sexual manner. On the show, I always thought that if Bette had hooked up w/Helena or someone more attractive than Jodi, Tina would’ve been kicked to the curb. Fans would not allow that to happen w/Jodi. Jodi was kind of frumpy and physically not Bette’s equal in the show. I never saw the connection. Marlee Maitlin never sold that character to me. She seemed physically uncomfortable in the role as a lesbian. At least when sexuality or physical intimacy was required.
Something else that I forgot to say was that yes, everyone changes and grows as the years pass, it’s called MATURITY, but this Bette is far from being, acting or showing any kind of maturity at all in this story. She acts as though she needs a brain implant more than anything else. As much as I want to see her and Tina reconcile and be each others Forever, I think Tina deserves a better person in her life than what Bette is showing in this story. Maybe Bette needs to see a psychiatrist in a hurry to talk with about the things she is feeling. No one in their right mind would consider having an affair with the woman who just a very few short years before did everything in her power to destroy you, take your wife and child away to be hers, just for sport and just to get back at you because her mother thought the world of you. What kind of sane logic is that? NONE AT ALL!!! And it is not realistic at all even taking thought this behavior of one or two degrees of separation sometimes shows up in the real world in lesbian relationships, but this one takes the cake. This Bette is as sick as sick can be. As you are the writer of this story I just don’t understand what you are trying to do with the story. I thought IC had her head on backwards a lot of the time with the show, you have outdone her with this one. I’m not trying to criticize your writing ability or style, although I’m pretty sure anyone would think so with this comment, but I’m just very, very confused about what this story is attempting to show us. I just don’t get it. I totally agree with BetteandTinaForever’s comment, “Well, F**K?”
BFFS’s and then suddenly soul mates right after. Those two? YHGTBKM. Here, shrinky shrinky, here shrinky shrink……:D
Another opportunity for Bette to be honest & she once again failed miserably. During their convo she had the perfect opportunity to elaborate on the true nature of her relationship with Helena and the fact that she has no interest in working things out with Tina. She at least divulged that Helena is living with her. I’m happy that lust-filled encounter didn’t go any further because Tina would be further hurt when she finally figures out what’s really going on. People do indeed grow & evolve Bette & you obviously haven’t gotten there yet. Bette needs to start on that journey. Maybe her pain is blocking her ability to sense when she’s causing other people pain. Who knows. I’m out of possible reasons for her behavior. This whole thing is too hard for my logical brain to make sense of. One minute Bette seems like a human being with feelings & the next it’s like she’s an android incapable of any human emotion or understanding human emotion. Is she going to have that same monologue running through her head when she decides to have a sexual encounter with Helena? She sure as hell wasn’t thinking about how Helena kissed Tina while she was kissing Helena. Maybe it would’ve dawned on her how weird their whole “thing” is. Therapy is without a doubt in order. She is being so co-dependent with Helena it’s scary. Hope she finds a way to somehow get it together emotionally & be honest for a change. It’s obvious that Bette has decided Tina is not the one for her. She needs to allow Tina to move on, by telling her the whole truth, so that Tina can find someone who will be the one for her and stop holding out hope for Bette to be with her again. I hope all involved can be happy separate from one another, but unfortunately, I have a feeling Tina will be the one worst hurt. Thanks for the story.
Can I just echo Dainty’s comment: “I thought IC had her head on backwards a lot of the time with the show, you have outdone her with this one.”
Thank you for not letting them continue that. It doesn’t seem real. It seemed kind of forced, like Bette was just experimenting with the situation. Perhaps she’s trying to find out how she will naturally react to Tina. Though, from her reaction, she really is not ready to move forward with any kind of intimate relationship with Tina just yet. Now, I wonder what her reaction to Helena would be if she let things naturally progress between them. Hmmm. Hurry up and come home Helena! Or at least call and talk to Bette. I love it when they interact. Their ‘friendship’ is the best part of this story. Though, honestly, they should be much more than friends. =) PPVS
This is such a great, compelling story–I look forward to each chapter to see where you’re going to take it!