TINA & BETTE

Bette was on her knees, sitting on the ground in front of Tina. She had lowered her head, so it was resting on Tinas lap and Tina was stroking Bettes hair. Both women were surprised at how intimate and absolutely natural this felt, even after everything that had happened between them, as well as not seeing each other for six months.

Tina, I am the one who broke your heart, please let me be the one to help you mend it. It is important for both us that I be a part of your healing. I understand if youre not ready to come back to me as my wife, but I want to be a part of your life in whatever capacity you want. Please, just let us do this together.

What I dont understand Bette, is how you can be ready for me to be your wife. You just broke up with Candace two weeks ago. How can you possibly be over her in two weeks, and if your not, how can you love us both?

Bette knew that what she was going to say would hurt Tina, but she had to respect Tina enough to share everything with herand she did.

I do still love Candace. She will always have a place in my heart.

Tinas tears started to flow again. Bette held onto Tinas hands and slightly squeezed them. Tina, Candace is a wonderful woman, and I learned some very important lessons being with her. She helped me to see some things about myself that werent very pretty. I will always be grateful to her for that. T, she has helped me to be a better person, and as much as I regret the unspeakable pain that we caused you, in the end, she helped me work through some issues that will make me a better partner. I hope a better partner to you Tina, not to Candace. As much as I love her, I am not in love with her. You are the one I am in love with. You are the one Tina, that I was born to be with. You are my today, my tomorrow, and every day after that until the day I die. I know that sounds dramatic, but Tina the love that I have for you is dramatic.

What happen to that love that you are talking about Bette? What happened to that dramatic love you had for me when you betrayed our commitment we made to each other, as well as to ourselves? If we were born to be together, why did you need to be with Candace? Im not asking these questions out of anger, I really need to know, because if you and I have a chance of being together again, I have to be able to trust that you wont go back to Candace if things start to go bad again. My fear would not be that you would cheat just for the sake of *****, I know how you feel about that. My fear would be that you will miss what you had with Candace, and all the wonderful things you learned by being with her, and will want to go back. I am sure that my fear is the same as the nightmare that Candace is now living – you left her to come back to me.

Bette looked directly into Tinas eyes. After everything that Candace did for me, I am incredibly sorry for causing her so much pain. I feel horrible for being the cause of what she is going through. In my quest for happiness, I have broken two hearts, and please believe me when I say that it makes me feel unworthy, but Tina you have the power to help me make up for some of the pain I have caused. Let me help mend at least one of those hearts. Let me be the scar tissue that heals your heart to become stronger.

Tina was having a hard time keeping from pulling Bette into her arms. She understood that Bette was being totally honest with her, and as much as she was loving being here with her, she couldnt help but feel sorry for Candace, knowing the pain she was in.

Oh Bette. I dont know how to resist you. I dont know how to turn you away. The love that I feel for you is also dramatic as you put it, but I cant express to you the fear that I am also feeling. That is what worries me, because someone who loves with fear does not truly love. So, I will ask you Bette, how do you know? How do you know for sure that I am who you want? How do you know that we wont go back to the way things were, the roles that we gave to each other? How can you be so sure that I am you destiny? Bette, you said something to me the other day that I didnt understand. You said you wanted to talk to me about our future with Mary. Please Bette, who is Mary?

Bette took a deep breath and got up from kneeling in front of Tina. She sat down in her chair and closed her eyes and prayed. She prayed that at this moment, the Universe would let her get out of her own way, and provide her with the right words needed to answer Tinas questions.

You ask me how I am so sure about us. How I know that you are the one I want. I know Tina, because I have loved you from the moment I saw you so many years ago. Even when my path took me in a different direction, I continued to love you. I know Tina, because I have seen our future together, and that future includes a soul that is waiting for uswaiting for us to get back together so she can be born. Tina, Mary is, or will be, I should say…our daughter.

Tina didnt know how to respond to this strange revelation by Bette. Was she serious? She had seen their future? What the ***** was

Tina, let me explain before you think I have gone off the deep end.

I have no doubt that this is going to be good Bette. Tina smiled, which gave Bette just a hint of encouragement.

It started right after you left for Vancouver. A couple times a week I would have the same dream. It was always the same, every detail of it, twice a week. In the dream you and I are together and Bette looked into Tinas eyes, Candace is not part of our lives. We are in our back yard and are surrounded by all our friends. We are all wearing funny hats and there are presents and food everywhere, because we are celebrating a birthday.

Tina looked at Bette expectantly, as she was already caught up in the story. Whose birthday?

We are celebrating our daughter Marys, third birthday. Bette stopped for a moment. Tina, I know this sounds far fetched, but I believe with all my heart that this is our destiny. Dont get me wrong, when I first started having this dream, I just thought it was my subconscious doing a little wishful thinking, but T, there was a moment one night where in the dream, I am looking at you and Mary and I just knew.

Knew what?

I knew that this was who we were meant to be. That night it was like I was in the dream, but also watching the dream, like from above. I cant describe to you the sense of peace I felt that night. I have had this same dream every night now since I broke up with Candace. Every night Tina.

Tina was overwhelmed, first by Bettes dream, but secondly that Bette believed in its meaning so strongly. What happened to the always logical, show me (not in a dream!)before I believe it, always have to be in control, Bette? The woman in front of her was admitting that not only did she not have control over her future, but that there was a grand plan for them which she was going to do her best to live by. Wow! Tina didnt know what to do with all the emotions she was feeling.

Bette, Im sorry, but Im having a hard time wrapping my brain around all of this. I think I need to stop for today.

Bette looked to the ground nodding her head. Ok T. I understand how overwhelming hearing all this must be. Do you think we can get together tomorrow though, I have something I want to show you?

Ahsure. How about we meet for dinner?

That would be perfect Tina. Thanks.

Both women sat in silence for a minute, not wanting to get up.

T? Yea?

“You know that I would love to have you stay at the house. You dont have to sleep on Alices couch.

Tina looked over at the pond and sighed. She wanted so badly to go home with Bette. Thanks, but Im enjoying catching up with the girls. Besides, I dont think I could stay in our house as just a guest, which is exactly what I would be.

“I understand Tina. May I pick you up tomorrow night then?

Sure, why dont you come by Alices around 7:00?

Ok, Ill see you then.

Tina got up and started to leave. Bette stayed seated.

Tina, this is such a lovely place. I think I will stay for awhile.

Ok, Bette. Bye. Tina walked away now more confused that ever. Not only did Bette understand how she was feeling, and didnt try to push her, but she was also taking the time to stop and smell the flowersliterally! This was definitely a woman who had changed in the last six months. Tina couldnt help the big grin that stayed on her face all the way back to Alices.