CHAPTER 10

I walked out of the room and into my bathroom. where above the sink I reached and found, my only way out of the madness in my mind. I looked at myself in the mirror and realized how much different I looked. I had an actually sincere smile shinning back at me, and my eyes are lit up like the 4th of July. Giving myself one last look I turned the lights off, and made my way back into my room.

Before entering I had to stop and think for a second. How was this going to work? How am I supposed to be with this person, if I don’t know what feelings are mutual and what are just curiosity? I spent most of my time trying to understand why she is even here. This all came out of nowhere and I’m not sure of what it’s going to become…

She hadn’t moved, except that she was wrapped up tightly in a ball under my white feather comforter. And that image brought me back.

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My grandmother and Spencer’s mom left about 2 hours ago for London. Spencer and I were in my grandmothers bed, she had this huge king size bed with down blankets and pillows, it was pretty much the most comfortable place in the world. as Spencer use to call it her” white heaven.” We were watching that movie Anger Management. It was cool and calm for the first hour or so, but I couldn’t help but begin to get bored. So she pulled her laptop in-between us and started showing me random things online, including her ex boyfriend on Match.Com. Ha-ha like I actually want to see that? I think sometimes she knows how I fell but she doesn’t want to show she knows.

I sat closely listening to everything she was telling me. Being the devil that I am. I insisted that she play that game called “the scary maze.” Sp while she was paying attention to the movie I was trying desperately to hold in a laugh as I set the game up. She was laying to my left and the computer was half way on her lap the other half on the bed. I hade to make up some story so that she would play.