When Dana was about to leave Alice’s apartment to hang out with Lara for the third day this week, the blonde could not keep her mouth shut anymore. She had tried to bite her tongue, to not think about her jealousy. And, most importantly, not showing her doubts to Dana. Her efforts made her withdraw from her girlfriend and bury herself in work, with the result that Dana increased her association with the soup chef. But now it was enough, Alice could not work with Dana at the Planet with Lara. She could not relax; she could not do anything at all but think about what might be going on between the former lovers. She had to say something. It was impossible to hold it in any longer. She had thought of a million different things to say, but nothing seemed to be the right thing. And suddenly, she just found herself improvising.

“Dana. I” Her mouth was completely dry, she could not swallow and her heart raced. It beat so hard she could actually see the pulse beating hard in the corner of her eyes. Her whole eyesight was shaking. “I don’t want you to go.”

Dana lit up. The journalist had not asked her to stay and just hang with her for a while. Alice was very busy and distant at the moment, and the brunette thought this might be the turning point for them to spend more quality time together again. She moved in and gave her girlfriend a lingering kiss on the lips.

“I’ll come back real soon, Al.” she murmured, resting her forehead against Alice’s, taking the pale hands in her own, entangling their fingers.

Alice sighed deeply. She wished Dana would not make it so difficult for her. I would feel much better if she did not have to spell it out completely. But she had to get it out.

“No No. I mean I I don’t want you to go be with her.” She did not even dare to look at Dana whilst she spoke; she fixed her eyes on a spot on the floor. The feeling of Dana backing away, slowly letting go of her hands made her mind scream ‘Shut the fuck up, before it’s to late!’ But it was already too late. The first letter had been spelled.