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    Alice Pieszecki Topic – What are you a top or a bottom?

    Story written on May 4, 2006 by Ripley18.
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    38 votes, average: 3.26 out of 538 votes, average: 3.26 out of 538 votes, average: 3.26 out of 538 votes, average: 3.26 out of 538 votes, average: 3.26 out of 5 (38 votes, average: 3.26 out of 5)
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    Character(s): , , , , , ,
    Number of Comments: 6
    Words: 2126
    Story Shortlink: https://www.assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=60733
    Author Notes:

    Friday Fantasy Challenge #2 Write a Scene with Alice giving a monologue.

    INT. KCRW STUDIO. ALICE’S DESK. DAY.
    Alice is hyper, she’s pulling at her eyelashes, while scribbling on a pad. ON pad:     THINGS TO DISCUSS, written below, 1) What do you do when a friend dies?; 2) How do you move on, after your friend dies? Then are a bunch of doodles on the page. Suddenly, it’s as if a light goesoff in Alice’s head. She’s got it.

    INT. PRODUCER’S BOOTH. CONTINUOUS.
    The producer is giving Alice her count down.

    INT. ALICE’S DESK. CONTINUOUS.
    Alice acknowledges the count down.

    PRODUCER (O.S.)
    Okay Alice, five, four, three, two, one and your on.

    ALICE
    Hi all you listeners out there in LA LA land. This is Alice Pieszecki, here on KCRW. Thank you for joining me this morning. We’re going to be talking about a subject I think needs clarification in the lesbian world. I’m talking about—

    INT. CAR ON THE 405 FREEWAY.
    Two baby dykes drinking coffee sitting in traffic and listening to Alice.

    ALICE (V.O.)
    Who’s the top and who’s the bottom in your relationship? What makes a top? What makes a bottom?

    Taken by surprise the baby dykes spit out their coffee onto the windshield. They begin laughing.

    INT. ALICE’S DESK.
    Alice is on a roll.

    ALICE
    Really now people, we talk about being a top or who’s topping whom. Are bottoms more lovable? Do bottoms have more fun. But, what really is a top or a bottom? Is it who has the most money? Who controls the money? Is it emotional superiority? Is it only a sexual thing?

    EXT. HELENA’S DRIVEWAY.
    Helena is pulling her Maybach out of the driveway, passing the new FOR RENT sign. Helena has KCRW on the radio.

    ALICE (V.O.)
    Do you have to strap it on to be a top? Can you be both, or can you, you know alternate?

    INT. HELENA’S MAYBACH.
    Tipping the Velvet is on the seat next to Helena. Helena’s thoroughly enjoying Alice’s monologue.

    ALICE (V.O.)
    Do you ever look at your friends and wonder if they’re a top or bottom? I have this friend, I’ll call her H. I wonder sometimes, she’s so beaut—

    Helena can’t believe what she’s hearing and doesn’t notice the blue Ferrari coming as she pulls out. Brakes Screeching. The Ferrari just misses hitting the Maybach. Pissed, and storming out of the Ferrari is CASEY, thirty five, brunette with a long pony tail, her long legs, look as if they’ve been poured into her well worn jeans. She’s sporting a pair of well worn cowgirl boots, a small t-shirt and a great tan. Helena is really sorry.

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    Comments

    2. You would think by looking at the title I’d have a clue as to what I was about to read, but no I nearly had a baby dyke moment. I almost spit out my frosted mini-wheats all over the monitor. Great job!

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