"How about if I’ll take my shirt off too?" she start removing it. "NO" I say firmly and she laughs. "So you can talk! O.k. so what do you think?" she smiles at me. What a great laugh she has…

"I don’t wwaant you tttoo sssee" I manage to say shakily.

"Oh sweetie I don’t care about the scars… I have some too see?" she points to the scare next to her eye and I can see some more on her arms. "It doesn’t change who you are…" how did she? Umm right she dressed me with this shirt in the first place…

I finally let go and she take the shirt off, gently then she start dipping the towel and cleaning my body she start with my back with slow circles she wipes it clean then move down to my belly and after some hesitation up to my chest, collarbone and finally my breasts.

if I wasn’t already shaking so much she would have felt the shiver that went throw me when she touched my breast for the first time… it never happened before, I mean Walter always touched me but it never felt good obviously… I didn’t think I could ever think about sex in a positive way again after what he did to me… I guess I was wrong "no you were not, you pervert!" I hear her mother in my head… ‘No don’t do this! Not now, we have company!’ I scream in my head "I don’t care about her!!" she screams "you think you can run away from me!" Walter joins her "no place is far enough I’ll find you I promise!" he pushes a sensitive matter and I lose it.

"NO DON’T!!" I scream and back away from her, she immediately removes her hand and covers me up with the blankets.

"O.k. honey I stopped its o.k. calm down." She rubs her hands up and down on my arms above the blanket to try and keep me worm and calm me down.   

"Remember how I used to touch you?" he asks in my head. I shut my eyes tight and try to shake him out of my head. It doesn’t work and I try grabbing at something to make it stop I don’t even notice at first but I rip my stitches. When I open my eyes I see the blankets are red with my blood which only servers to increase my hysteria.