I cry cause I can't find the strength to stop,
I try but only till my knees have dropped

Her voice broke on the last word, and she bit her lip to keep herself from crying. As I saw the tears fall and her body shake uncontrollably, I started to cry, too—dry, silent sobs. I had never hated myself more than I did in this moment. I was disgusting. My Bella was crying over me, for me. I’d hurt her, I’d made an angel cry.

Flat line I wish my heart could just shut off cause I can't go on alone without you

She took those words right out of my mind. I’d missed her so much. Why did I have to be the revolting bloodsucker that I was? Why couldn’t we just be two humans falling in love? Why did fate have to work in such cruel, ludicrous ways?

As I say my prayers in bed, I wonder if I reach you or am I just calling out in vain?

For everything has been said, I'm thinking how can this be fair?

It’s not fair, Bella. Nothing is fair. If this world were fair, I wouldn’t have had to let you go. I wouldn’t have had to kiss you goodbye. I wouldn’t have to see an angel weep.

I wonder will I see you there?
But I can't find the need to take a breath, if you are gone then I've got nothing left
My life, shouldn't I rather face my death?
Than to go on without you
I cry cause I can't find the strength to stop
I try but only till my knees have dropped
Flat line I wish my heart could just shut off cause I can't go on alone without you

I lost all control and found myself growing closer to her with every step that I took. She was oblivious to my presence, though, her eyes fixated on the keys as she took another breath to finish the song.

Maybe I'll meet you in my next life if that's okay with you…

Of course it’s okay, Bella. It’s more than okay.

Maybe I'll see you there through my shining light
Until then I'll be blue…

Her voice broke again, twice, as she choked on her tears. I clenched my fists, holding them down at my sides, willing myself not to get any closer.

But I can't find the need to take a breath, if you are gone then I've got nothing left

Edward Cullen! I yelled at myself. Move away from her, there’s still time.

My life, shouldn't I rather face my death?

And yet I felt myself take another step forward, another step closer to my Bella.

Than to go on without you

You left her for a reason, you selfish monster! She was so close to me. So very close. I knew there was no turning back now.

I cry cause I can't find the strength to stop
I try but only till my knees have dropped
Flat line I wish my heart could just shut off cause I can't go on alone without you

“Bella?” My voice was hoarser than I’d expected, my words came out as nothing louder than a whisper. She gasped and the melody had stopped, her hands falling into her lap as she whipped her head around, raising her tear-filled eyes to look at me. I stood rooted before her, my eyes trying to say what I failed to put into words. For once, I was completely vulnerable. I didn’t find the need to hide it. I showed her, I showed it all to her—

the hurt,

the remorse,

and the love that was always there, that always will be.

And a belated merry christmas to all of you! thanks for reading