CHAPTER SEVEN

Too close,

Knowing if I touch her, she’ll get burned.

Teetering on the edge of self destruction,

Obviously no lesson learned.

Try my hardest to keep my distance.

Close my eyes, never speak of truths,

But with the sound of her name, I get lost in an instant.

I keep telling myself to listen.

I’m no good for her and I know it,

Mess around and our friendship, I’ll just blow it.

My true affection for her, I can’t show it

I wear her on my chest like the scarlet letter A

Discovering her in my sheets as I lay.

Loving her gets more involved everyday.

This dilemma remains unsolved everyday.

I can’t stand to think about her in anyway…

            The sound of Spencer’s chair scrapping across the tiled floor interrupted my poem.  I looked up from the paper that I had buried my face in, locking eyes with her.  She gazed at me for a moment, pain and tears behind her eyes, before running out of the classroom.

            “Ms. Carlin?” Professor Yenser called after her.  He looked back at me as if to shed some light as to why Spencer ran out.  I just shrugged my shoulders as I started to nervously play with my paper.  I wanted to chase after her.

            “Ms. Davies, would you like to continue?”

            “Um,” I looked down at the extra lines on my page as they started to blend together through my water damaged eyes.  Clearing my throat and forcing the tears to stay, I shook my head, “No, that was all I had for now.”

            Professor Yenser nodded, less because he believed me and more because he could see my face twisted in distress.  As the next student rose up to recite his poem, my mind drifted elsewhere.

            It had been four days since I decided that I would keep my distance from Spencer.  When she got back to the dorm from her date, all the lights were off and I was lying in my bed, awake. 

            “Assshhlleeeyy,” Spencer called out to me in a very sing-song voice.  Clearly she had had a good time on her date and if there was any inkling for me to answer her, it died with that.  I held my eyes shut and breathe deeply through my mouth, making it sound like I was already deep into my sleep.