This is why Ashley was scared for Spencer. As much as she envied the pseudo-Brady Bunch and deep down in the recesses of the tainted part of her soul, would take small delight in the destruction of the nuclear family, she knew it would hurt her girl. Not only would it hurt Spencer, it would hurt Clay and Mr. Carlin, two people who she respected and liked very much. Even though she would love to put a fist in his mouth most of the time, she had grown to tolerate Glen too and the thought of the breakdown and how it would affect those people pained her. The only sliver pleasure she could get from the downfall would be from Paula’s unhappiness, and even then it was no where near worth it.

She only wanted Spencer to be happy, and in her own fantasy, perhaps she could become a part of that family through her relationship with their youngest member. Hell, even if she wasn’t an honorary Carlin she would be happy just for the acknowledgment but of course, the cheating spouse of a good man wouldn’t let that happen.

Still, the friendships she had made in her past served to fill the gaps of the family she never had. Aiden, though at one time was her boyfriend, had become the protective older brother she had always wanted. Dano was the same, except her age and a girl. But it was Dano’s family most of all that kept Ashley from permanently sliding into that dark place she always feared she would be enveloped in. They reprimanded her, loved her, and cared for her just like a real family would have. She was an honorary Bearclaw and she took pride in being apart of such a group of people. They were dysfunctional in their own right, but she loved them. Now her only wish was that she had stayed with them instead of almost completely destroying her life and nearly…

“Ash.”

The soft calling of her name shook her from her thoughts. “Huh? What?”

Her disorientation had obviously amused Spencer since the girl was grinning slightly. “You kinda spaced out on me there for a minute.”

She shook her head lightly to clear out the cobwebs before slouching down in her seat. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”