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A Life I Never Meant Chapter Fourteen
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I walk quickly to Shane’s room, my head down and willing myself not to look back. I know that Bette must have seen me. We were barely ten feet apart when I passed her while she was buying something in the store. My heart is racing, but I can’t quite pinpoint why. It could just be the shock of seeing her after all this time, or it could be just the affect that seeing her has on me. I remember a time when even the mere mention of her name would make my heart beat a little faster. That seems so long ago now.
As I enter Shane’s room she looks up at me and smiles, I already know what she is about to say because I’ve been thinking it all the way up here. We nearly met, nearly talked, were very nearly within touching distance of each other, and I can’t quite decide whether I’m happy or sad about that.
“God Tina, Bette was just here.” says Shane, looking worried at what a close shave it’s just been.
“I know. I saw her.” I reply, breathlessly.
“You saw her? Just then? Did you talk to her? Did she talk to you?”
“I saw her Shane. She was buying something and I saw her, at first I couldn’t believe it and then when she turned to look at me I knew that it was her.”
“What was it like, seeing her?” asks Shane, obviously shocked and yet excited by this turn of events.
“Heart stopping.”
“Yeah?”
“Shane, it was like…my heart was telling me to turn around, to go back and talk to her. To tell her how good it was to see her and tell her how much she still means to me…”
“But your head told you…”
“My head told me that I have a girlfriend back in New York who I love very much and that seeing Bette complicates that issue far too much, and really I would be better off leaving before anything like that happens again.”
“Your head?”
“Don’t ask Shane. It’s easier if I leave my heart out of the equation.”
“Do you think you’re capable of doing that? The Tina I know decides everything with her heart.”
“And look where that got me. Nowhere, but wishing to fix something that is irreparable.”
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plz plz tell me next chapter they r gonna talk
damn..you are killing me…please have them talk…have Bette chase her to NY this time. post soon
Love is not about Safe…..is exactly the opposite, you gamble a part of your life everytime you make a decision, you can win or you can loose,but when you win, OMFG….And I don´t think Ally would like to be with Tina because she is the “safer” choice. This is a wonderfull history, thank you very much for sharing it with us. a humble reader and loyal fan.
Wow – you write the most amazing dialogue for these two. Shane is just so direct – hopefully Tina is listening and will do the right thing by Bette.
Damn, pls pls don’t make me wait too long for the next chapter, I’m almost falling off my seat!!!
Shane is a really good friend. If Tina wants an end with Bette, she should at least let go of Bette.
Great chapter CG.
please don’t leave me hanging! hehehe i love this story! so well written! kudos to u! i can’t wait to read more! LOTS LOTS MORE! =)
Man, you are killing me. Urgh.. why taken them so long just to TALK! Bette has to do something NOW before too late. Great chapter.. more please :)
The option is to love whom you love or who loves you. Everyone has different reason to choose. And, I feel sorry to say this: Tina, forget Ally, she is great, but Bette is the one.
The entire damn mess makes sense to me now thru Tina’s (your) commentary.I like how you have the anvil not falling too hard on either of their heads. Reflective honesty. If she truly can’t get passed”working so hard that the quicksand won’t happen again” then Tina really should let Bette go”. Carnage is a harsh term but if Tina truly feels that way she’s better off playing it “safe” with Ally. Poor Ally. Bette deserves a fresh start and Tina at this point seems seriously Bette fatigued. Tho i can’t tell if she’s being pragmatic or just tired of thinking about it. What are you doing tonight? More please…. This fwas an excellent chapter in a great story. Sue
I suppose I can forgive Tina’s avoidance of Bette on this occasion. Moments like that can be quite a jolt. But she needs to get her shit together and talk to Bette, just like Shane was saying.
Your story is amazing – the pace the wanting and the fear of rejection and taking the wrong path – just awesome how you are laying it all out. and letting Alice be wise is a stroke of genius – life seasons people and loss and you have written this really well. Thank you for sharing your figts with us.
So sorry – that’s sharing your GIFTS – your wonderful marvelous writing with us- the phone rang as I was typing and I jumped sky high and just hit send . Again, thanks
I think Ally will leave Tina whether Tina chooses her or not, cause this is a make or break deal. Ally knows this that’s why she is puching for tina to talk to Bette. Ally is a smart girl and knows that Tina is more safe with her than anything else. Ally does not strike me as the type to “settle” on being a safe choice with anyone. Tina needs to stop being a pussy and just talk to Bette. Bette needs to get off the “woe is me” express and step back into reality and talk to tina. Still don’t want a Tibette reunion but who knows I may change my mind. Post soon!
post more. good job.
i understand why tina wants to keep it safe but this is not what love is all about..i hope talking to bette will help her to see that she and bette belong together
You have left me wanting more. Hope the next chapter is soon.
This story is so complex. You write it beautifully. Thanks.
Safe is not always what it is cracked up to be. If Tina stays with Ally that safe will turn into longing and then depression. You can already tell that Tina is scared because just one look and she is already beginning to unravel. I already get the impression that Bette desperately wants Tina back and hope that Tina will eventually want to return to Bette. Do I get to dream so that my tibette heart still has the chance to beat strongly again.
So, Tina will use Alice/Dana as her justification for staying. So, the return ticket is already bought. Tina always has a back channel, back burner going, doesn’t she? Does Ally know what she is getting into? I think it is patently clear which way Shane wants this to go. Whether it will, it remains to be seen, and that’s the beauty of your fanfic. Thanks!
Pls pls let them talk before Tina leaves. They are meant to be together! The dialogue between Tina and Shane was written so well. Thanks!
If Tina returns to NY before talking to Bette, whatever that outcome may be, she’ll never get the closure she thinks she may have by escaping back to her girlfriend. Wonderful dialogue between Shane and Tina. Looking forward to the next chapter.
I’m so enjoying your thoughtful, intelligent approach to this story. It’s truly heart-wrenching to read but always leaves me anxious to read your next chapter. Thanks for sharing it!
please hurry ‘the talk up’, I’m desperate here on the edge, lmao
Please don’t let anything be wrong with Shane. That wince of pain was far too ominous. Love your writing and cannot wait to read your telling of B&T’s reunion (B&T together forever PLEASE :)). Great chapter, thanks city
Heartbreaking…
WOW!!!!! Great Chapter. Please have Tina talk to Bette. Thank you
post now
Slowly building to the conversation… I like it. Fabulous. I just hope there’s a happy Tibette ending…
Wonderful as always! Still have my fingers crossed btw :-)
I echo what others have said about being “safe.” If I wanted to be “safe,” I would have never admitted to myself that I’m gay and I’d still be in a relationship with a guy who makes watching paint dry on a wall sound like fun. It’s great to feel safe when you find the one and know they’d never intentionally hurt you, but playing it safe is bad.
Nice contrast between this story and the ‘Angie off to college’ one. You do a great job writing both versions of B&T&co. Thanks!
I’m jumping on the bandwagon that Tina NEEDS to talk with Bette. Its obvious she still has felings for me Bette that is why she is ducking and diving. They both need to love each other like they never been hurt; put it out in the open and wipe the slate clean. Nobody wants to be with someone just to say you have someone- there needs to be love and a connection, not just some safety blanket b/c you’re afraid you’re heart will be broken again.
This is killing me, Tina soo Belongs to Bette and she could never go back to Ally as she will always think what if, please make her see sense
WOW!!!!