“Carmencita you can wait a bit longer I want to talk to you.” fuck don’t leave me alone, “alone.”

Shit. Shit…shit …shit, please don’t leave me alone. Looking at her hopping that she would say something that she would bring me with her. She looks me in the eye, that look of questioning curiosity fuck I want to kiss her. Shit what is it about her that makes me want to kiss her so much.

“Now Carmen.” her voice sending cold chills down my spine that fears returning.

“Ok…ok geez just give me a second.” she looks annoyed, her noise wrinkled her eyebrows furrowed together.

She whispers to her sister, walking over her hand brushing over mine on her way up. The heat from it making my head cloud with the smell of her shampoo as she went up the stairs after her mother.

“So Shane…saw your ad.” shit that fucking ad, well at least there not yelling yet. Bring on the pitch forks.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Walking up waiting for what ever she was going to tell me. She looks…I don’t know, I can’t really tell. And it’s scaring the shit out of me, fuck she isn’t happy about Shane. That looks of terror on her face when she said that she wanted to talk to me alone. Shit Evie better make sure there not to hard on her.

“So what do you want to talk about mom?” a small hole in her comforter, god I love this thing it just reminds me of home.

“Are you happy?” she asks in that way only mothers can, god I love her.

“Yeah…I am, more than I ever thought I could be.” she nods her head, trying to understand what I’m saying. “She’s changed mom.”

She walks to her dresser rearranging all of the little things on it; it’s what she does when she’s nervous. I can hear there voices drifting through the window, and I have to bite my lip to keep from laughing at that look on her face.

“I’m happy for you,” looking at her, how she is holding a picture of me and her when I was three. “I like her better than Jess…she wasn’t good enough for you.”

Fuck Jess was completely different from Shane…she was so sure that they would love her. That she would win them over, god the look on mom’s face when we left. Even Carlos likes Shane better…well I guess they saw what I didn’t. Thank god that it was only that one dinner.