I cant…I cant..
You cant what, Tina? Alice said standing by my side.

I looked up from the bouquet of jasmine and white lilies at my new friend Alice.

I cant do this… I cant marry Bette.
What do you mean you cant marry Bette? She downstairs waiting for you along with fifty or so other people.

I dropped the bouquet staring at them as they laid on the floor.

I cant do this… Im not ready for this, I whispered slipping down on the queen sized bed.
Oh god, Tina… dont do this to me. You have to marry Bette. Right now or else she is going to kill me!
Im sorry, I cried as fresh tears began to slide down my cheeks.
No, no.. you can do this… you will do this… I know that youre scared shitless right now, and I would be too if I was marry Bette. I mean, my god, look at her.. She is beautiful. Drop dead gorgeous. And that would intimidate anyone. I know I would be… thinking how on earth will I be able to keep her happy and satisfied…

I looked up at Alice with wide eyes.

I know, I know… Im not helping the situation right now… but its the truth… Lucky for the both of us I will never have to worry about that because Bette is more than happy, more than satisfied than shes ever been. And thats because of you, Tina. Ive never seen Bette this ecstatic over anyone. She loves you more than life itself. You have a long standing seat right next to Evan in her heart, Tina. Bette has never let any woman get that close before… so for you to do that in such short of time… you have broken down the steel wall that she had built around her heart. You are the lucky woman who gets to love her. Be happy. Be ecstatic.

Alice held my hand as she handed me my bouquet. I looked down at it and then up at her.

Ready? she asked.
More than ever, I smiled.

*****

I couldnt take me eyes off of her. She was more than I had ever hoped for. And as we stood facing each other as the guitar cords began to play softly. My good friend from my early days in California lent her beautiful voice to the song she wrote especially for me.

I want to laugh until I cry…
Wake up with you each day til I die
Lets go to New Orleans
and watch the parade
Take funny pictures, eat jambalaya and
drink lemonade
and when the day is finally over
and we stumble home
Before we sleep
Baby, marry me

I wanna drive
Until we get lost
lie in a field string up at the sky
while you point out the Southern Cross
somehow I know without asking why
That you love me more in a minute
Than anyone could in a lifetime
Dancing in the parking lot
While the band plays inside
Sweep me off my feet
Baby, marry me

We dont need no preacher man
readin from the Good Book
And I dont want no fancy dress
Aint no ceremony for the vows that I took
From the moment I met you
I have been blessed

So lets make a toast
and drink up the wine
Heres to you lying here next to me
Until the end of time
Wherever you are
I wanna be
and anything that means anything to ya
means everything to me
Sneakin out the back door
While theyre throwing the rice
And theyll talk for weeks
But were all we need
So baby, if youre free
Marry me
Baby, marry me
Marry me

By the end of the song… I was on my knees again proposing my commitment to her.

Wouldnt have it any other way, she whispered.

*****