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    The Weather Report

    Story written on June 1, 2014 by Blackbird.
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    9 votes, average: 5.00 out of 59 votes, average: 5.00 out of 59 votes, average: 5.00 out of 59 votes, average: 5.00 out of 59 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5 (9 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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    Genre(s):
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    Character(s): , ,
    Number of Comments: 15
    Words: 2702
    Story Shortlink: https://www.assertive-maroon-jellyfish.104-250-143-187.cpanel.site/?p=85828
    Author Notes:

    The longer I sit here dreaming of rum or vodka and getting drunk by three the more this whole day feels odd, suspended in time and very much like earthquake weather. I’m sure of it now. I have a sense the ground is just about to shake. My iPhone signals a text from Tina. ”Need

    The longer I sit here dreaming of rum or vodka and getting drunk by three the more this whole day feels odd, suspended in time and very much like earthquake weather. I’m sure of it now. I have a sense the ground is just about to shake.

    My iPhone signals a text from Tina.

    ”Need an eyewitness. U free?”

    I text back, ”Sure! What’s up?”

    Text from Tina, ”Can U meet me @SheBar in 10?”

    ”Eww. Okay. I’ll bring garlic.” I motion to the waiter.

    The SheBar – Alice

    Walking up the steps to the SheBar I drink deeply from the smuggled vodka and grapefruit juice cocktail I sneakily poured into my travel mug before I left The Planet. Man, am I glad I told the bartender to make it a double, I hate these tacky lesbians from Miami.

    Now that I’m inside I hear the shrillness of Tina’s voice as it begins its dangerous rise into higher altitudes. This makes me smile. Thank God! Something interesting! Wasn’t I just lamenting that it was all too quiet? I smile to myself as I hurry down the hallway toward the commotion. When Tina gets unnerved like this someone always leaves the plane without their parachute. Oh Good! I think until I open the final door.

    What the fuck is that thing? And then a poster on the wall tells all: Lesbian Hot Oil Wrestling! Every Thursday Night at LA’s Hottest New Girl Club – The SheBar. My eyes blink three times real fast then I hear Tina.

    ”What I’m fucking telling you is that you need to quit interfering with my movie! But you don’t seem to hear me because you’re either too stupid or too idiotically self destructive to listen to me.” Tina stabs her finger toward Denbo who remarkably keeps her cool. My Girlfriend Cindy walks from the back toward the wrestling ring.

    Please a gold bikini? So Miami Beach! But damn she looks good in it. I push salacious thoughts of My Girlfriend Cindy’s bikini from my mind.

    But still…

    Then Tina’s voice snaps me out of my fantasy.

    ”One last time, Denbo and you, too – whatever the fuck your name is – I’m warning you. Stay away from our locations! Stay away from my set, leave my employees alone, and fuck off! Fuck way off from my movie! Do you hear me?” Tina yells furiously at them both.

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    Comments

    1. Oh my God, this one cracked me up! I could clearly see the whole thing as if I was there, and when Bette came through the door, the picture of her that you chose is PERFECT! I love angry Tina, she’s hot as hell.
      This is, by far, one of the most hilarious things I’ve ever read. And seen through Alice’s eyes is even better.
      Keep ’em coming!

    7. Oh, my God! It was much better than I expected! : D I leaned in laughter.
      angry Tina, an oil wrestling, it’s an image that stuck with me ;)
      that’s true, the picture of what you have chosen from Bette was perfect, almost I could see in front of myself: Bette as an enraged bull, rush to the bar :D
      It was a little weird that Alice was now the “wise friend who has seen the errors of her friends and what they should do. usually she intervened into the lives of everyone.
      maybe she press them in the right direction before Jodie back ;)
      I very like this and look forward to the next chapter

    8. Hi5> fistbump> Fireworks!!!
      Ta da! You did it incredibly well and I’m so proud. I had to hold onto my chair as I was laughing so much with the movie playing in my head. I love that Alice has become wiser and more helpful rather than a hindrance. The underlying current grows in strength.
      Thank you for your amazing writing of Behinds the Scenes…..

    11. An enraged Bette is truly a force of nature especially when her Tina is in danger or in a precarious situation. Like all your fans, I could visualize the scene perfectly. I love how Alice stood aside and held Bette’s jacket while Bette plunged in w/o fists flying. Hilariously exciting! How do you keep surpassing your previous efforts?
      Ms. BB, you’ve got some mad skills!

    12. LOL…love the wrestling story…i can’t for the life of me imagine Bette in the wresting ring, knowing her how she is…and Tina is the bomb!! Tina don’t take shit from no one no matter how nice Tina is… she has a hot sexy side!!! I also love the mystery you wrote about Tina’s Background…it more like an investigation background that i enjoyed. funny story love it… keep it coming girl!!!!

    13. Love it bb! ..There is so many scene that is hilarious…I can’t choose which one I laugh the most!

      *Applauding* I love your version more than I.C. …And I think this is how it should be, cuz it makes more sense to me? :p…PPS ….<3

    14. lolololololololololololololool omg that was sooooo funny I would have paid all the money in the world to have seen that fight shit lmfao….and Tina and Cindy wrestling in blond hair everywhere can you say Hot!!!!!!!!!!!

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